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The phrase "Do as you would be done by" springs to mind......

YES! That's it exactly! I can trust others, even if they end up hurting me, cause I can trust myself to be strong enough to live through it. Even grow stronger from it. I can rely on me, and can trust me, therefore I can risk trusting others. Thank you Al!

OMG, I just agreed with you again! It must be nearing the end of time!

That's what I have always thought, but it let me down this time.

I'm trying to avoid the life sucking first phase..............

Well said

in my opinion , having sex is a matter of chemistry and need not just trust, i think there are a lot of women out there that have had sex without the benefit of love and trust. i dont want to upset anyone, i am just being honest

I did not read through all, since I see trust as a not singular word but needs to be combined with a subject.

Still, when my love is late - I get worried, not suspicious. That is trust.

When I am late, I hurry, because I know she worries, not that she will become suspicious. That is trust.

If too many questions follow an already declared reason, trust is not there.

Did you earn it yet? It is the only way to get it.

If a person is being nice and the ther person just hurts you, then doing as you would be done by isn't working very well, because only one person is living it.

Out of balance.....time to move on.

No don't do that, you can't avoid it. Life is gonna suck at times. The question is how you deal with it. The more you try to defend against it, the worse it is.

Like getting caught in a briar thicket. The worse you fight it the worse you're gonna get scratched up. Relax and ease your way out of it and you'll be fine, or at least not quite as cut to shreds.

Maybe we can learn to stay out of the briars to a degree, or at least not keep jumping in the same patch, but life is always gonna have new thorns to throw our way. We live and learn and carry our scars, and keep on living till it's over.

You have a point. Sometimes there doesn't have to be trust but I am talking about when there does need to be trust, then how do you guage it?

How did you get to that place though? Did it take time? Was it how much you knew about each other?

2012

once you take your own trust to the level you speak of YOU become empowered instead of being defensive, angry and mistrustful , which really only hurts you, despite some people's intent on spreading it to others.


We fuck up, we dont have crystal balls (no matter how much I try to shine mine ) we take chances and risk because we want the good things. Finding someone who is angry and not in touch with THEIR feelings because you took a chance, should have nothing to do with your power or your trust.

life is always the same, it's where you stand that defines your world.

You give really sound advice. I suppose I thought that if I could recognise a way to recognise a trustworthy person, then I'd be finding less briars.

this is how it is forever .. alone (married or not) only you are living what you are living.

if there has to be trust, then it must be over time.....time to know that the person is honest and there are no excess baggage.

I agree with what you are saying and actually lived my life that way, sure I could cope with what life sent me, (and did), trusting my abilities to cope and recover. I still have that. I just ended up questioning my ability to recognise a trustworthy person after this last one. It's difficult having to tell yourself you f**ked up again.

Standing on shaky ground for the first time in my life, in my beliefs in my ability that is.