Thread:

Signs You Drink Too Much Coffee!!!

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Jokes & Humor

Signs You Drink Too Much Coffee!!!

Missouri dating
mylifewithu
springfield, Missouri USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 2:39 PM CST
- You answer the door before people knock.
- Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
- You ski uphill.
- You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
- You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
- You lick your coffeepot clean.
- You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
- Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
- You chew on other people's fingernails.
- Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
- You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet.
- You can jump-start your car without cables.
- Cocaine is a downer.
- You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
- Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
- You don't sweat, you percolate.
- You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel.
- You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
- You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
- You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
- You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
- Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
- You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
- People get dizzy just watching you.
- You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
- The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
- Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
- Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
- Instant coffee takes too long.
- When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
- You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
- Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
- You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
- You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
- You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
- You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
- You short out motion detectors.
- You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
- Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
- You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
- You don't tan, you roast.
- You can't even remember your second cup.
- You help your dog chase its tail.

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Georgia singles
lktolbert
Atlanta, Georgia USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 2:53 PM CST
[quote=mylifewithu]

- You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
- Your only source of nutrition comes from "[s}Sweet & Low [/s]" "SPLENDA"
- You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
- Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
- Instant coffee takes too long.

.rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing


Yep, that's me!
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free dating singles
darlynda
new tazewell, Tennessee USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 2:55 PM CST
good one rolling on the floor laughing
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Wexford singles
jampet
wexford, Wexford Ireland
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:06 PM CST
yep -sounds about rightrolling on the floor laughing
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Missouri dating
mylifewithu
springfield, Missouri USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:28 PM CST
These I think I can do, all thanks to coffee

You short out motion detectors.

You chew on other people's fingernails

You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.

rolling on the floor laughing
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Michigan singles
somechick
Cincinnati,Ohio, Ohio USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:30 PM CST

Good one and funny.
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Dont_Look_Now
Huntsville, Alabama USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:30 PM CST
mylifewithu wrote:
- You answer the door before people knock.
- Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
- You ski uphill.
- You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
- You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
- You lick your coffeepot clean.
- You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
- Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
- You chew on other people's fingernails.
- Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
- You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet.
- You can jump-start your car without cables.
- Cocaine is a downer.
- You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
- Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
- You don't sweat, you percolate.
- You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel.
- You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
- You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
- You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
- You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
- Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
- You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
- People get dizzy just watching you.
- You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
- The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
- Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
- Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
- Instant coffee takes too long.
- When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
- You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
- Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
- You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
- You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
- You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
- You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
- You short out motion detectors.
- You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
- Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
- You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
- You don't tan, you roast.
- You can't even remember your second cup.
- You help your dog chase its tail.
help You can NEVER have too much coffee grin
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EnSilencio
Almunecar, Andalucia Spain
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:33 PM CST
From first to last, I am all there rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Dont_Look_Now
Huntsville, Alabama USA
Posted: Jul 23, 2008, 3:42 PM CST
Going to get more coffee....happy place

Where's the daggum coffee emoticon? mumbling
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Posted: Jul 24, 2008, 11:45 AM CST
You go to the doctor for blood work and he comes back and tells you that you have had to much coffee even though you have not even had the first cup.
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LovingMassage
Central Missouri, Missouri USA
Posted: Jul 24, 2008, 11:51 AM CST
You spend more time in the bathroom than you do on connectsingles.com
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Missouri dating
mylifewithu
springfield, Missouri USA
Posted: Jul 24, 2008, 11:52 AM CST
LovingMassage wrote:
You spend more time in the bathroom than you do on connectsingles.com
Just buy a lap top then and stay in there all dayrolling on the floor laughing sticking out tongue rolling on the floor laughing
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