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I've gotten two phone calls from a friend of another friend. They're both trying to set me up with this woman. I guess you could call it a blind date thing. My buddy can't tell me anything about her other than her name, and she knows nothing about me.

I don't know what to do about this because I don't want her finding out I'm in a wheelchair, and run the other way. I want to find a girlfriend, but without the drawbacks. Needless to say, I am seriously hesitating.

Don't find reasons not to try , go on the date, be positive, let her see the good side of you. Risk is what you always have to take if you want to find love.
Give her a chance, Good Luck!!

Well, like I said , my buddy can't tell me anything about her. I don't want her to take one look at me, and find something wrong. I think I'm just going to tell them I'm not interested. Its better than getting crapped on. She'd be better off with somebody else anyway.

Go ahead pass her up, and if she just happens to have not minded you being in a wheel chair , then you blew it. You could be passing up the right one.
All of us single people take a chance on being crapped on as you say, but we take the chance . Sure it might be a bad date, but if you show a positive side, heck you might at least have fun. So then not all was wasted.

No......I think I'll just spare myself the humiliation. Its just better that way.

Just have them tell her, and see what she thinks, no sense in shocking someone, and if she knows ahead of time, I'm sure she won't be running the other way.

You want to find a girlfriend without what drawbacks?

All people have to do is be honest, and upfront. Either people want you for who you are, or they don't.

Telling her ahead of time will only allow her to judge me in advance. I'm not interested.

if my input matters-refer to the consistent responses ive always posted

Then why be on a date site , if you aren't going to take a chance. Why keep complaining that you can't find someone. If you aren't going to try then why do all this other.

What do you mean?

Beats me, I'm not having much luck here either. I checked my viewed list. I had an 18 year old look at my profile. That's all I get? Any younger, and she'd be too young to even be on here. Any younger, and I'd be in jail.

Telling her ahead of time will only allow her to judge me in advance. I'm not interested

Personally I don't think you are really interested in meeting anyone. Why so bitter? If you shock someone, by not being up front with them, then no, they probably won't be interested. I know a few people that are in wheelchairs, and they have met someone that really loves them, but that didn't happen through deception. And they most certainly didn't have your attitude.

When I was about 35,I dated a man in w/c,paraplegic.We went eveywhere,had a great time.He left me for another woman.His appeal was he acted as if he were just like anyone else,he was just sitting.Yes agree withabove,tell her ahead or your friend should.

I can understand what your saying and fear of rejection is frightening for all of us regardless of whether we are in a wheelchair or not. I think you should tell her first , talk to her and let her have an insight to the person you are, if she does not want to meet you because of it she was not worth meeting in the first place, look at who you are and build on that . Good luck

Hi Dreamer82 you have had some very good advice here so far from everyone.

I can understand your hesitation and though I'm not religious, even the bible
says "God helps those who help themselves" so you need to get out there
and have a go.

Remember that if you don't then you will have to live with the "WHAT IF'S"
and that can be hell ( no pun intended). So don't miss any opportunity.

Good luck.

I saw a beautiful young woman years ago, she was in a wheelchair, I am not. We caught eyes and I wanted to talk to her but was painfully shy at that age and never approached her. I'm sure she though something like what you are thinking.

Don't sabotage a date. Maybe there's something they know about this woman that makes her look past disabilities.

I know a guy, partially paralized, drags one leg as he trys to walk, hands are closed up. He never had a problem finding girlfriends and just got married 32 years ago for the second time. He has 2 sons in their 20's from his first wife.

Think of this as practice. You never know what could come of it.

Woman love to kiss, your lips are not stuck to the wheel chair right?

You have had some great advice from people here.

I can only add, would it be possible to go out with another couple of friends as a foursome, so as to make it more of a friends night out rather than a 'date' and all that that word seems to hold in terror for you?

Dude, just go for it! What do you have to lose? An evening? A nice meal? A chance to get out and about and socialize a bit?

Why do you think I put the pic of me with my prosthesis hanging out? Can't hide it...I worried about the same things as you...that I would be perceived as somehow "less" of a man...I'm just a man with a fake leg, that's all! The rest of me is real....

Why do you automatically discount the womans ability to look past the chair and see the man? Not everyone is a shallow, myopic idiot. I say give it a shot...if nothing else, at least you rule *her* out as a potential mate....plenty more out there..

Of course, the safe path, be sure and stay on it by yourself the rest of your life. But quit yer b*tching about not being able to meet anyone if you're not willing to actually meet someone. I hate to be blunt (no I don't) but I've read your posts since you came on here, and your biggest handicap is not your wheelchair. Yeah I know, being in a wheelchair sucks. But your life doesn't have to unless you want it to.

Now, that is what I call a true blind date

I would go, this is one of those occasions where no one of the involved have had a chance to "colour" the date in any direction, you are to unwritten pages to meet.

As much as I am practical I am too a hopeless romantic and I think some things happen for a reason. Do not care for that reason now, just accept, and maybe we won’t see you here for a while.