Connecting Singles^® Forums 100% Free Online Dating

Spanking and hitting are two different things. Hitting a child in anger is always bad, slapping a kid in the face is just mean. But a good swift whap on the butt when a kid's doing something they know better than can get their attention. I respect people's decision not to, but don't see anything wrong with an occasional swat when called for.

I see where you are coming from Bev, I have done a tap, on the hand, to prevent a chubby finger exploring, I have done a gentle guidance with my hand, I have grabbed when they are about to jump off walls.

A swot is one thing.

A spank on the bottom, that depends, what a twent stone man sees as a spank, may not be seen as a spank to a child or a swot by any other standards.

OMG!! More informed opinion on how to raise children from someoone who has none!!!

Soooooooooooooooo on top of the kids trauma for having burned the house down or other catastrophic results you would hit them?

take a chill pill, Flower


are you realllllly going to say you never, ever, ever, ever swatted your kids bum?

No one should be spanking a kid except a parent who loves them. A loving parent is not going to inflict harm on a child. That only happens when a person is seriously disturbed. Back in my day we didn't see anything wrong with a teacher or principle in school whipping a kid, but nowadays I wouldn't go for that, there are too many warped people that I wouldn't want touching my child, or grandchild now.

I as a parent who loves and adores my children would not want to spank them.

I just do not believe it works.

I am of the mind it gives off the wrong message. You do not conform, you get a hand raised to you.

What message is that giving, that they can grow into adults and hit, spank, when a person does not do what you think they should.

How many times, I have seen it here lots, women have said, the minute a man raises his hand to me I am off?

A child does not have that option. To leave.

I don't either....Just a tid bit about spanking from my child hood....when we were little my dad used to give my brother the belt when he did something wrong...we are 1 year and 9 months apart and were close...He would take hm in the other room and I guess that's what was going on...but his reaction...the crying ans sheer sound of pain and hurt broke my heart even as a little child...I didn't get the belt...I don't remember having a hand laid on me when I got in trouble...I don't know if it was because I was a girl or because I was sick when I was 4 and almost died...needless to say...I didn't use that that to benefit myself...I used that to try to help my brother by saying I did things that he actually did so he wouldn't get in trouble....I always owned up to it after the fact sort of after the heat died down...but I just couldn't bare to have my brother hurt like that....so yes...spanking...the belt...whipping..whatever the choice of hitting is...does have it's long lasting effects and one of them is fear even if you don't see it...and it can be in more ways than one!!!!!

Hurting a child is bad but so is not pulling the reins. I've seen children put in time out and decide that they did not want to be there ,,,, then what do you do? verbably abuse them? psychologicaly manipulate them? put them in military school? let them run rampent? drug them? ..... use a tazer? ,,,,,,, have them spade or nudered? ................ i'm geting a bit silly but heck what do you do when they resist time out? ( no i have no children to taze,spade,or nuder).

I do however have a friend that his parents never argued in front of him , they made a point of never arguing in front of the children... so now my friend does not have the skills of handling a confrontation of any sort, even if it is two people arguing compleatly unrelated to him.


Dennis

For my kids, I used time out...and it was very effective.

(Had to spank each one only once to find out how ineffective that was. ) On a more serious note than that, refused to raise a hand to my children in anger, and was careful with my words to, to make sure that they knew it was their actions I was angry about and didn't like, not them. I refused to repeat the mistakes of my mother.

For me...oooh, yes, spank me if I'm a bad girl!

I agree with this...just found it didn't work as well with my kids.

Actually, the punishment that still works best in their teens even, is removing privileges. They lost their favorite toys for an hour as toddlers, their Gameboys for hours later, and now computer days. Next will be the car.

The punishment should fit the crime!

A spanking never really hurt any of us Old Farts, but that does not appear to be politically correct in today's society...

Yet making one take a time out and stand or sit in the corner can be a real ego crusher also..

YES!!!!!!!!!!!

How about the old days when they made the students sit or stand in the corner with a dunce cap on?! I had a teacher in first grade who still did that, and the ruler-on-the-knuckles. I did each a lot the first half of that year...we reviewed Kindergarden, and I'd attended it twice for "socialization" since we lived so far out in the country.

Parents. Trust me, the three boys that lived next door were enough to toughen anyone, and make one not shy.

Funniest part was, I couldn't wait to learn how to read...only to find out I was still bored. I'd taught myself at the age of 4, and didn't realize I was far ahead of my fellow classmates until we started it. TG for my 2nd grade teacher. She put me in my own advanced reading class when she realized the problem.

I think I'd prefer a spanking if it was done the right way.

OH we are talking about kids lol My little girl is really well behaved so much so that the little things she does wrong - I may yell for a minute but then I take a TIME OUT myself.

My kids are smart-asses and discipline is iffy at best.

For example if there's a bit mess and I ask my oldest Huey (now US Senate Page from Tx) he would point at his little sister and say "Hattie did it" Id look at Hattie and she'd point at Alex Possum and say "Possum did it" Alex would take a long look at me- smack his long tail on the ground and if I continued to stare at him say "Hey I'm a possum ...sue me!"

Spanking is perfectly fine by me, I firmly beleive in spare the rod, and spoil the child... There is nothing at all WRONG WITH WHOOPING A KIDS ASS, when they continue to act out....the key thing that people need to remember, is that along with the spankings the child receives they need an explaination as to why they were spanked, and they need to know that you truely love them by you telling them that and SHOWING THEM....

There is no such thing as "well he/she is just BAD" no!!!!!!!! It is the parent that is failing to step up to the plate and discipline when they need discipline and to show their unconditional love ALL the time..

Then you have you people out there that will say you will make the child fear you and not love and respect you when you hit them...well I tell you what, I got my ass beat ALOT and a child doesn't fear the parent, they fear the soon to be hurt ass...

Hell everybody in my neighborhood that my parents knew real well was allowed to whoop my ass if I got out of line at their house, then they would call my house and tell my parents why.... so then I got another as whooping... Shit I needed alot more ass whooping then I ever got....

YOU can call me a child abuser or whatever you like but my child will learn to be respectful and disciplined...

period

In today society everone wants to think, well just tell little tommy that he wasn't nice in doing what he did, and then they send them to their room I firmly beleive that is where you get alot of these crazy ass little kids plotting school shooting and commiting suicides, because they are just ignored and shoved out of veiw....so they concoct crazy shit being locked up, why to you think when most people get out prison they are worse off...

Each thing is different and each child is different,many methods need to be known to handle things as best as we are able.







As my father would say,"Kid! Do you love me! By Damn you better or I'll pull your arm off and beat you death with the bloody end of it."

HE WAS PLAYIN!

OH! Did I tell ya'll I am left handed?

Nothing wrong with a man being left handed.

Thats the arm I got left! he didn't rilly beat me to death though.