Agree to disagree....just your opinion

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tina_olson Westby, Wisconsin USA
kissmedeeply: Hello again hope all is well with you..

Yes i totally agree..

they come over and just tare things up becos they
were allowed to get away with everything..

My both boys goes to people places..and the parents
told me they are so well behaved..thank you and pls
to everything and they dont reach for anything unless
they ask first.


Doing Great Joanne--a little cold here but you know what low temps are like...lol

Your children and mine sound alot alike--I too was disiplined as a child and my parents have my full respect, not fear...

Well temperature rose from -30 to -17 so going to head out to work-have a wonderful day!!
morgan5 somewhere sunny , Canarias Spain
kissmedeeply: Well these threads like this always leads to us being
child abuser..

that is why the last thread was deleted
hi joanne wave everytime this topic is posted, the same thing happens. Same as you i don't agree with beating or abusing but do believe a smack on the bottom does not do any harm, provide it is not done in temper and other methods have not worked. In the Uk kids do as they want and there is no comeback.



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
tina_olson: Doing Great Joanne--a little cold here but you know what low temps are like...lol

Your children and mine sound alot alike--I too was disiplined as a child and my parents have my full respect, not fear...

Well temperature rose from -30 to -17 so going to head out to work-have a wonderful day!!


you too dear..

give me a mail sometime..

so we can catch up again

have a great daybouquet
Fallingman Dublin, Dublin Ireland
Indeed,

And a smack on the bottom can lead to good outcomes in the right context! I wonder if I just went off topic there! laugh wave



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
morgan5: hi joanne everytime this topic is posted, the same thing happens. Same as you i don't agree with beating or abusing but do believe a smack on the bottom does not do any harm, provide it is not done in temper and other methods have not worked. In the Uk kids do as they want and there is no comeback.


I know what is it with these threads the past weeks or so

I just dont get it..

Yeh i here you there with no discipline at all..they
will do and say anything with no respect



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
Fallingman: Indeed,

And a smack on the bottom can lead to good outcomes in the right context! I wonder if I just went off topic there!


you did and didntgrin
morgan5 somewhere sunny , Canarias Spain
Fallingman: Indeed,

And a smack on the bottom can lead to good outcomes in the right context! I wonder if I just went off topic there!
scold rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing



rasgumby Moberly, Missouri USA
greenoctober: Spank or time out? Which do you prefer, why or why not.


Neither!
I had to beat the crap out of my son!!

you are wondering why, because he voted for Bush a second termboxing

Our Government must be right!They would only do what is best for us..right!
so. never whip your kids, wait till they grow up and let out Gov put them in prison so other inmates will whip them for you.
doh



Tamarin somewhere, Lothian, Scotland UK
morgan5: hi joanne everytime this topic is posted, the same thing happens. Same as you i don't agree with beating or abusing but do believe a smack on the bottom does not do any harm, provide it is not done in temper and other methods have not worked. In the Uk kids do as they want and there is no comeback.


You are a lovely lady but I have to disagree with your last statement about there being no comeback in the UK on kids that misbehave.....to wide sweeping a statement there is good and bad all over the world. Many children in th Uk are disciplined in some way or other.

Princemuncher.....gosh I would love to talk to you at a parent's evening.....I think we would agree on many things. My two are the same age as yours and yes embarrassment seems to be a great form of discipline at the moment!laugh

Here is a few quotes from a report by Save The Children in Europe.

'Most children see smacking as an other kind of hitting and have negative feelings about their parents/adults after being physically disciplined. Children do understand they have to be told off if they misbehaved. They should be punished but say going without candy/pocket money, not allowed to play, sent to their bedrooms, missing out on a trip is more effective.
Smacking in some reinforces cycles of violent behaviour and does not build a positive relationship.

Views from a few children.

'When I am smacked it maked me feel horrible inside and I think my Mom feels horrible for having done it.'

'Bullies smack me and I don't hit them back out of fear and they hit harder just as the adults do to me.'

Save The Children says the following about smacking.

Smacking does not teach children self discipline.
It gives attention to a child's bad behaviour.
Children learn best by attention to things they do well.
There are positive alternatives to smacking.
Smacking teaches children to hurt others.

I totally agree with the poster that says society now dictates that we work long hours, have less time for our children and children are not always nurtured as we were when many off us had stay at home Mothers. In school you can pick out the children who have been in full time day care since three months old and through guilt their parents buy them all the time....we call them institutionalised children.

I personally should spend more time with my children.

In Florida we are invited to ex pat friends homes and are amazed by some (not all) of the way the local kids behave in a stranger's home. Swinging from bannisters, very loud and much to forward. Can anyone tell me if children in the US are taught to be seen and not heard and do not speak until an adult speaks to them!
DoznEggs Any town, New Jersey USA
Both. Depends on the situation. At times, a spanking is in order. Mind you, I said a spanking, two smacks on the rump. Not a beating! More often than not, "time out" is all that's required.

I was spanked maybe a total of 3 times that I remember and turned out just fine. Didn't know what Dyfs (sp?) was until I was a grown-up. Children today threaten parents with calling Dyfs, it's out of control.

JMO




kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
so you notice the things they do well and praise
and ignore what they do bad???

smacking does not teach them to hurt others..

it teaches them not to do things that are wrong
and bad..

pubwrite08 District Heights, Maryland USA
vinny1967: How's your son ?
He has cheered up some, he was kidding around with me telling me he was going to mail me a grandchild.
princemuncher northfield, Ohio USA
http://faculty.biola.edu/paulp/spare_the_rod.htm

This makes spanking a bit more clear.

There are NO medical/psychological studies that conclude that spanking teaches children violence.

In response to: Argument #2: Physical punishment establishes the moral righteousness of hitting other persons who do something which is regarded as wrong.

Counterpoint: The "spanking teaches hitting" belief has gained in popularity over the past decade, but is not supported by objective evidence. A distinction must be made between abusive hitting and nonabusive spanking. A child's ability to discriminate hitting from disciplinary spanking depends largely upon the parents' attitude with spanking and the parents' procedure for spanking. There is no evidence in the medical literature that a mild spank to the buttocks of a disobedient child by a loving parent teaches the child aggressive behavior.



Just thrwing out a counterpoint.



Tamarin somewhere, Lothian, Scotland UK
pubwrite08: He has cheered up some, he was kidding around with me telling me he was going to mail me a grandchild.


Thats what grandma's are for....but remember you can always send them back!rolling on the floor laughing
morgan5 somewhere sunny , Canarias Spain
Tamarin: You are a lovely lady but I have to disagree with your last statement about there being no comeback in the UK on kids that misbehave.....to wide sweeping a statement there is good and bad all over the world. Many children in th Uk are disciplined in some way or other.

Princemuncher.....gosh I would love to talk to you at a parent's evening.....I think we would agree on many things. My two are the same age as yours and yes embarrassment seems to be a great form of discipline at the moment!

Here is a few quotes from a report by Save The Children in Europe.

'Most children see smacking as an other kind of hitting and have negative feelings about their parents/adults after being physically disciplined. Children do understand they have to be told off if they misbehaved. They should be punished but say going without candy/pocket money, not allowed to play, sent to their bedrooms, missing out on a trip is more effective.
Smacking in some reinforces cycles of violent behaviour and does not build a positive relationship.

Views from a few children.

'When I am smacked it maked me feel horrible inside and I think my Mom feels horrible for having done it.'

'Bullies smack me and I don't hit them back out of fear and they hit harder just as the adults do to me.'

Save The Children says the following about smacking.

Smacking does not teach children self discipline.
It gives attention to a child's bad behaviour.
Children learn best by attention to things they do well.
There are positive alternatives to smacking.
Smacking teaches children to hurt others.

I totally agree with the poster that says society now dictates that we work long hours, have less time for our children and children are not always nurtured as we were when many off us had stay at home Mothers. In school you can pick out the children who have been in full time day care since three months old and through guilt their parents buy them all the time....we call them institutionalised children.

I personally should spend more time with my children.

In Florida we are invited to ex pat friends homes and are amazed by some (not all) of the way the local kids behave in a stranger's home. Swinging from bannisters, very loud and much to forward. Can anyone tell me if children in the US are taught to be seen and not heard and do not speak until an adult speaks to them!
think we will have to agree to disagree wine



Tamarin somewhere, Lothian, Scotland UK
princemuncher: http://faculty.biola.edu/paulp/spare_the_rod.htm

This makes spanking a bit more clear.

There are NO medical/psychological studies that conclude that spanking teaches children violence.
Just thrwing out a counterpoint.


Read the article with interest...tried to pull it up here on my PC in the UK. I could not find it. Interesting to see that it was an American article just shows the difference in cultures...all very interesting.

Yes off course there is a difference between a short, tap on the bottom and being hit anywhere else. I think I may be right saying in Sweden it is against the law to smack a child, some one will tell us.

Here is a question for you if your partner misbehaved in your eyes would you smack(spank) them. So if I displeased my ex it was okay for him to hit me.

May be I am asking the wrong guy hererolling on the floor laughing devil keep it clean and not to much info please.laugh
Fallingman Dublin, Dublin Ireland
morgan5: think we will have to agree to disagree


How very agreeable! wine
vinny1967 On Tour, Devon, England UK
pubwrite08: He has cheered up some, he was kidding around with me telling me he was going to mail me a grandchild.


rolling on the floor laughing

Hope it wasn't be DHL laugh

Glad to hear he's in good form

wine
morgan5 somewhere sunny , Canarias Spain
Fallingman: How very agreeable!
hello wave having bought up 2 children both completely different can seee different things work with different children so we need to respect each others opinion.



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
morgan5: hello having bought up 2 children both completely different can seee different things work with different children so we need to respect each others opinion.
well said my dearthumbs up




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