HondoLaneNJ wrote:Well, I try to teach him how to follow his gut: how to recognize when there is harmless chiding or poking fun going on and when to realize that he is the target.
To recognize that bully's, most of the time, are bigger then you are but you can't let that stop you. Once you realize you *are* the target you have to make a choice. The school has a "zero tolerance" policy about bullying but...most of the time they do squat. Personally, if someone came up to me now and did what bully's did then: I'd whack him right in the mouth before he could say *boo*.
I am trying to teach him to defuse the situation before it gets out of hand...if he has to punch the punk: so be it. I told him I won't punish him for a pre-emptive strike. But he *better* be right...or I'll find out! lol....
This fascinates me, because i would be interested Hondo is why you feel that your son would have to punch out to stop the bullying.
People do think that bullys are usually big people who pick on little people and in my experience this is not always the case.
A weak person can be a bully, a person with low self esteem can be a bully, because they manipulate other people when challenged on something into believing that the person challenging them, is a bully. So they gather their group who then turn against the challenger, and you have a bully on your hands, but the person with the low self esteem will make out that they are hurt because they are being bullied.
People generate towards people who have had a rotten time, so for instance and I hope you do not mind if I use you as an example, if a person was to post something about only having one leg, you with your wonderful attitude towards the fact that you have one leg, would join in the fun and laugh it off, because you deliver it so well. Therefore we all do not need to jump to your defence, because we know you know it has happened and you have to live with it.
A person who is battered about it, angry and feels that they have been cheated, would defend the comment, they would withdraw, feel at though they had been got at, snipe back and people would protect him, because it is the 'right' thing to do. So that group who are protecting the one legged man, would turn against the person who had posted that and bingo, we have bullying going on.
I have seen this happen many times in forums.
Not with one legged people, or one armed people, but with people who have low self esteem, they manipulate other members into believing they are being attacked and the challenger is turned against.
You happen to be the most gorgeous, handsome, funniest bestest one legged man I have ever come across.
