kamelia: So tell me you have more experience in this than I do
When my marriage fell apart, I felt the need to get the divorce finalized as soon as possible. My question is why wait? Unless you are unsure if you want out..
That last is certainly a premier possibility, I'll grant you that - especially if the two "separated" individuals are living under the same roof or are otherwise still very much involved in each other's lives.
But for every general truth there are notable exceptions. First, it's quite possible that no romantic connection exists though the two parties are still friends. They may be still separate because in some countries (or states) a year (or more?) is required before a divorce is legal. They may not have divorced because they are intimidated by the expense or hassle involved. They may have zero interest in reconciling, but are nonetheless reluctant to admit such a failure in their lives. People are complex creatures, and there exist many possible motivations for any number of actions.
That being said, I would agree that the most likely answer remains that separated people who do not actively pursue a divorce have some doubts about getting that divorce. The likelihood of that increases, I think, in direct proportion to the degree of emotional/social connection that still obtains between them. If you are considering getting involved with a separated person, it is critical to assess whether or not that person's feelings toward his or her spouse have been satisfactorily resolved into mere friendship and/or indifference.
CAVEAT EMPTOR.
