How honest are you?

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druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
tryingtoexplain: There are more things much more important in life than white lies... like integrity..... who really cares what anyone has to say anyway... I know when people are sometimes lying to me... and I never care... in fact I aid them just so it wont cause them embarrasment.... People have REASONS for lying... its their personal business, and as long as the nature of which does no harm to you so what?

On the other hand.... what is your stand on stabbing people in the back.... or involving yourself in something you dont need to against another human being just because its against your own priciples.... and or "rules" that you personally abide by? Would you join a witch hunt? Would you inform on another person because it is your inherent nature to do so?

Lies be dam#ed there are other forms of human behavior that warrant much more consideration...........


Btw...this was an excellent and well-expressed response. I hope you find my response to it to be the same. wine
Big_John Ocean Springs, Mississippi USA
I firmly believe everyone tells lies from time to time and for various reasons that makes sense to themself. Sometimes it is just easier. Sometimes it is to keep from hurting someone else. Sometimes it is to cover your own ass. It would be a lie to say I don't sometime.
druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
Big_John: I firmly believe everyone tells lies from time to time and for various reasons that makes sense to themself. Sometimes it is just easier. Sometimes it is to keep from hurting someone else. Sometimes it is to cover your own ass. It would be a lie to say I don't sometime.


I have told white lies in the past...mostly to my parents for my own survival and to protect them from knowing more than they needed to of my activities. I have certainly told the CYA type, especially in the Army. I don't with my friends or SO. Lies should have no place, nor necessity, in those relationships. JMO.



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
My Husband is honest no matter what the cost..

Me i am honest for the important stuff..

I have lied in my lifetime and am sure all you have..

we all lied before for a reason..good/bad or what have you..

I am sure we will all learn from our choices in why we
told one..

but that is life

Live and learn



buzzy biddeford, Maine USA
If you have to tell little white lies to your partner because you know what you are doing will upset them, then you are with the wrong person, for you and them. If you are teling your partner lies to protect the relationship, stop. Tell them it is not working for you anymore. Being a liar creates stress,angry and unhappiness in your life. Lying about who you are only creates negativity in your life. Why do you want to live that way?
If you know your partner is lying to you. They are doing things behind your back that you can not tolarate in your life. Get out. They are not the right one for you. And don't think you will be able to change them. The only person that can change them, is them. You may say, "But I really love them." That may be true. But, does the liar really love you? If they really love you, would they lie to you? People, listen to me. YOUR HAPPINESS, YOUR HEALTH AND YOUR INTEGRITY are the only things you really have possession of. Do not let others take that from you.



Tater springfield, Illinois USA
I just tell it like it is, if feeling are hurt, then though I may feel bad, well feelings are hurt, I honestly have never done anything wrong in a relationship(ethically speaking) never ied, cheated,used,etc. but at the same time I hold them to the same standards, and they know that from the beginning, I don't give do-overs. period

maybe that's why I'm singleconfused but at least I have my peace of mi...thumbs up
druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
kissmedeeply: My Husband is honest no matter what the cost..

Me i am honest for the important stuff..

I have lied in my lifetime and am sure all you have..

we all lied before for a reason..good/bad or what have you..

I am sure we will all learn from our choices in why we
told one..

but that is life

Live and learn


So true, Joanne. wine hug



kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
druidess6308: So true, Joanne.
hug
druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
buzzy: If you have to tell little white lies to your partner because you know what you are doing will upset them, then you are with the wrong person, for you and them. If you are teling your partner lies to protect the relationship, stop. Tell them it is not working for you anymore. Being a liar creates stress,angry and unhappiness in your life. Lying about who you are only creates negativity in your life. Why do you want to live that way?
If you know your partner is lying to you. They are doing things behind your back that you can not tolarate in your life. Get out. They are not the right one for you. And don't think you will be able to change them. The only person that can change them, is them. You may say, "But I really love them." That may be true. But, does the liar really love you? If they really love you, would they lie to you? People, listen to me. YOUR HAPPINESS, YOUR HEALTH AND YOUR INTEGRITY are the only things you really have possession of. Do not let others take that from you.


Well said, Buzzy. Very well said. thumbs up
druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
Tater: I just tell it like it is, if feeling are hurt, then though I may feel bad, well feelings are hurt, I honestly have never done anything wrong in a relationship(ethically speaking) never ied, cheated,used,etc. but at the same time I hold them to the same standards, and they know that from the beginning, I don't give do-overs. period

maybe that's why I'm single but at least I have my peace of mi...


hug Same here, Tater. I expect the same honesty and faithfulness to be returned. If it's not, then I'm done. No regrets, no do-overs. Once my trust is gone, there is no more relationship.

Bless those who have gone through having a partner lie to them or cheat on them and rebuilt the relationship...but is it ever the same afterward? I doubt it.

I have continued one relationship after discovering of his lies and cheating...but I was young, crazy about him, and accepted that the relationship wouldn't be more than it was...so, continued the fire and ice/on again, off again madness while the ride lasted. Did it one more time briefly a few years later...and then walked away when he offered me a live-together friendship with other partners. And of course, being partners when we didn't have others. It was the best offer he was capable of making then...and I accepted that as I said good-bye. I have no regrets about any part of that relationship, nor the leaving it behind.

heart wings



Tater springfield, Illinois USA
druidess6308: Same here, Tater. I expect the same honesty and faithfulness to be returned. If it's not, then I'm done. No regrets, no do-overs. Once my trust is gone, there is no more relationship.

Bless those who have gone through having a partner lie to them or cheat on them and rebuilt the relationship...but is it ever the same afterward? I doubt it.

I have continued one relationship after discovering of his lies and cheating...but I was young, crazy about him, and accepted that the relationship wouldn't be more than it was...so, continued the fire and ice/on again, off again madness while the ride lasted. Did it one more time briefly a few years later...and then walked away when he offered me a live-together friendship with other partners. And of course, being partners when we didn't have others. It was the best offer he was capable of making then...and I accepted that as I said good-bye. I have no regrets about any part of that relationship, nor the leaving it behind.




I've have done the same with my first girfriend, I ended up dating her twice almost three times within a 6six period, thinking that well, maybe she grew up , well I was wrong....shit happens and we learn from past experiences. It makes us less niave but unfortunitely quicker to judge others, because we have already lived through it... know we see all the early signs....

Some people say I'm judgemental, and well they are right. I'm not stupid enough to give some people the benefit of the doubt, when I can already see what the future hold by their actions up to this point...JMO
druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
Tater: I've have done the same with my first girfriend, I ended up dating her twice almost three times within a 6six period, thinking that well, maybe she grew up , well I was wrong....shit happens and we learn from past experiences. It makes us less niave but unfortunitely quicker to judge others, because we have already lived through it... know we see all the early signs....

Some people say I'm judgemental, and well they are right. I'm not stupid enough to give some people the benefit of the doubt, when I can already see what the future hold by their actions up to this point...JMO


hug I can understand if someone's actions show them to be like another has already been. I don't think many of us reach our mid-20's without being hurt by another, and we tend to remember those hurts. However, I don't judge a new partner by what past partners or lovers have done to me. They are not that person. But yes, there are behavior patterns that certainly serve as warnings to one if you've been there before. No, I don't give the benefit of the doubt if I see a pattern that I've seen before, and already know where the road is likely to lead.




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