Ill admit it Im scared

THREAD AUTHOR

pretzelman Las Vegas, Nevada USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:27 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

Many have wondered why I am on a dating site, if I am not looking for a partner. I have asked myself the same question.

Although I present myself as a mean old man, there is a reason. I mean other than the fact that I am a mean old man. I am scared of relationships.

People say they want honesty...so here it is!!

When I say scared, I don't mean scared for me. I am scared for the other possible mate. I run them off(yes, believe it or not, a few have expressed interest) more to protect them from me.

But here are a few of my fears in relation to relationships.

First, and foremost is money. So self respecting woman wants a guy with no money. Now, don't tell that lie about money means nothing to you!! You'll get coal in your stocking for that!!

Health issues. I have a lot. Too much to burden any woman with. Let it go at that.

Fear of losing my independence. I like being free

Possessions...I have none. And I do mean none! No house, no car, no nothin'

Last but, not least...the physical aspect. Although many women say looks and outward appearance mean nothing, remember that coal I talked about in the beginning of this post???

Be honest,,,you wouldn't date Quasimoto!!!

I stand back and look at me, a 58 year old man. And I think, if I were a woman, would I want to get involved with this man??

A resounding....HELL NO!

So do any of you give yourself an inventory to see why a person should want you as a partner??? Or do you only see good in yourselves and believe a person is crazy not to want you??

Serious answers, please. I want to hear about YOU, not what I think of myself. Do YOU do an honest assessment of yourself?[/b]

O.K>...now I will shut my "mangina"

vonney Dublin, Dublin Ireland

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:32 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

Sure I do hun and depending on how I am feeling that inventory changes.

I am a middle aged single Mother of 3 (one with a learning disilbilty) with a history of mental illness and will be on meds for the rest of my life.

I am short, a bit overweight, have stretch marks and a bit passed mny sell by date.I have been in a very abusive relationship and am always weary of the next one.

God Starlin could go on all night, what did you start.....

pretzelman Las Vegas, Nevada USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:37 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

vonney: Sure I do hun and depending on how I am feeling that inventory changes.

I am a middle aged single Mother of 3 (one with a learning disilbilty) with a history of mental illness and will be on meds for the rest of my life.

I am short, a bit overweight, have stretch marks and a bit passed mny sell by date.I have been in a very abusive relationship and am always weary of the next one.God Starlin could go on all night, what did you start.....

See? Told ya I was a mean old man

vonney Dublin, Dublin Ireland

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:37 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

pretzelman: See? Told ya I was a mean old man

And you just love proving your point

sxc666 Central Coast, New South Wales Australia

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:40 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

I think what you are feeling is normal Ship.

I think the majority of us pick the shit out of ourselves.

We often hide behind laughter to hide our pain. We often get short tempered because we are hurting.

My problem is most people piss me off, why? because they BS to much, they are fake and society seems to have forgotten how to be an individual. I see a world full of greed, a world of 'what can I get out of you'.

I see one member on here, you would think was Mother Theresa with everything she writes..........NO ONE IS THAT PERFECTand that alone shits me to death. FAKE

So basically everyone as a whole have experienced being wrong, being right. We all shit, piss and fart. We have all had sex.

What is important to me is if I feel someone is coming after something for the wrong reason. I have the power to stand up and say 'fuck off'.

Do I get lonely and depressed at times? Bet your sweet ass I do. But I would rather feel that, then be sleeping beside somebody for comfort reasons only.

My inventory is a mile long, but its my inventory like it or lump it is my opinion. In the last year alone I have learnt more than ever that this is my life and no-one elses. Get in the way of the road I'm building for myself and kids, and I'll run you over like a B double.

JMO

jbibiza Ibiza, Islas Baleares Spain

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:40 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

First off if you want others to give an honest opinion then you need to as well. The fact that you have run women off, to save them from you, shows that you are not unattractive... and do you really think that your crusty exterior fools any of us??? We see right through it and love you for your effort!

Ship you show a great tolerance and open mind, you are not an abusive man and have a kind heart in spite of your efforts to cover it up... so please, knocking yourself isn´t honest... try taking a look at yourself through someone else´s eyes, stop and look at the women who are posting things like should I stay with a man who beats me when I´m pregnant... and realize how much you truly have to offer someone.

Ok... now I´ll shut up... sorry I broke your rules

hopefloats Slim's Lady, Tennessee USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:43 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

Thank you for your honesty Ship! That says alot! And I assess myself ALL the time! I'm overweight. And can't lose it because of health issues. I have more health issues than your average 37yr. old. I'm not drop-dead gorgeous and look like a model. I live with my sister and brother-in-law for various reasons. My boys aren't 18 yet. Well, the oldest one will be next year. ALOT of guys don't want someone with teenagers. And I'm not wealthy. I'm also a burned-out Christian. So there's my honesty in a nutshell for those interested......

Hugs to one and all,
Merky

mike69spain Bucharest, Muntenia Romania

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:46 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

pretzelman: See? Told ya I was a mean old man

I have got the impression that you are very much in real life as you are on here.

Am I right?

Well, ladies, does that scare you?

For money - at that age, most people have got their own economy to some kind of level, bit it low or high, but they are used to it. I do not believe they really need to find financial support; it is something else in their mind.

For health - don't we all build up a number of issues over time? I have so far got three to live with, and I am sure they will increase with one every 5 years.

Relation wise, to let someone in to the privacy of your life and mind, the fear of commitment has a point. I was scared of that just thinking about it, I'd still be if I was to figure out what I would do if I did not commit to one that already know me.

Your biggest problem is that you have become an icon here and therefor almost untouchable

gozoman2 Xaghra, Gozo Malta

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:46 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

sxc666: I think what you are feeling is normal Ship.

I think the majority of us pick the shit out of ourselves.

We often hide behind laughter to hide our pain. We often get short tempered because we are hurting.

My problem is most people piss me off, why? because they BS to much, they are fake and society seems to have forgotten how to be an individual. I see a world full of greed, a world of 'what can I get out of you'.

I see one member on here, you would think was Mother Theresa with everything she writes..........NO ONE IS THAT PERFECTand that alone shits me to death. FAKE

So basically everyone as a whole have experienced being wrong, being right. We all shit, piss and fart. We have all had sex.

What is important to me is if I feel someone is coming after something for the wrong reason. I have the power to stand up and say 'fuck off'.

Do I get lonely and depressed at times? Bet your sweet ass I do. But I would rather feel that, then be sleeping beside somebody for comfort reasons only.

My inventory is a mile long, but its my inventory like it or lump it is my opinion. In the last year alone I have learnt more than ever that this is my life and no-one elses. Get in the way of the road I'm building for myself and kids, and I'll run you over like a B double.

JMO

I love this lady.....

In brief, me...myself...and I......and if u don't like it....lump it.

Right Tina?

sxc666 Central Coast, New South Wales Australia

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:54 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

gozoman2: I love this lady.....

In brief, me...myself...and I......and if u don't like it....lump it.

Right Tina?

In short yes. I can compromise, but I will not change for anybody. I am me. I am the person you met and dated,and are now seeing. So why try to change it now. The changing thing is a major thing for me, as soon as I see it I'll clam up and know it's like Big Brother 'It's time to go (insert name here'.

Woman after money only does happen. I heard it being spoken of. I've seen it happen. I know one lady that will not even think of seeing anyone if they earn under $75,000 a year. I've known others to say "l'll marry him, and then divorce him" and they have.

I'm sure there are womans cases out there too. But to deny we are looking for more than a pumping good heart is BS. We do have to be sexually attracted to a person. We do look to see if a partner will be secure. We do look to see what sort of life we will live with a partner.

Frig me I could blab forever on this topic.

>>>>>>>>> Hand microphone over to next person

kitty01 Edmonton, Alberta Canada

Mon Dec 22, 2008 2:58 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

I feel like you do Ship.

No money, I am on social assistance

No house, Live with my daughter

Health, panic attacks, asthma, trouble walking, arthritis over all of my body

Have 5 kids- two will not talk to me
- three who have alot of problems, which I cannot separate myself from

Feel who would want a 58 yr. old lady with so much baggage.

So you see we are all alike in some way.

wixomwizard Wixom, Michigan USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:03 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

pretzelman: Many have wondered why I am on a dating site, if I am not looking for a partner. I have asked myself the same question.

Although I present myself as a mean old man, there is a reason. I mean other than the fact that I am a mean old man. I am scared of relationships.

People say they want honesty...so here it is!!

When I say scared, I don't mean scared for me. I am scared for the other possible mate. I run them off(yes, believe it or not, a few have expressed interest) more to protect them from me.

But here are a few of my fears in relation to relationships.

First, and foremost is money. So self respecting woman wants a guy with no money. Now, don't tell that lie about money means nothing to you!! You'll get coal in your stocking for that!!

Health issues. I have a lot. Too much to burden any woman with. Let it go at that.

Fear of losing my independence. I like being free

Possessions...I have none. And I do mean none! No house, no car, no nothin'

Last but, not least...the physical aspect. Although many women say looks and outward appearance mean nothing, remember that coal I talked about in the beginning of this post??? Be honest,,,you wouldn't date Quasimoto!!!

I stand back and look at me, a 58 year old man. And I think, if I were a woman, would I want to get involved with this man??
A resounding....HELL NO!

So do any of you give yourself an inventory to see why a person should want you as a partner??? Or do you only see good in yourselves and believe a person is crazy not to want you??Serious answers, please. I want to hear about YOU, not what I think of myself. Do YOU do an honest assessment of yourself?

O.K>...now I will shut my "mangina"

OMG....We could be twins,only add 6 yrs.

I'm so poor, I can't afford to pay attention and the government is repossessing the vacant lot I'm living in. My belly keeps my feet from getting sunburned in the summer and my teeth are like stars, they come out everynight. Health wise, I've had TB as a babe, polio as a pre-teen, prostate cancer 5 yrs ago, a major heart attack 9mos ago. This body needs another trip down the assembly line. You think you lack of love prospects? I could'nt get laid in a womans prison with a fistful of Presidential Pardons....literally.

Welcome to the club of old age....other than all of that, I'm fantastic but getting better all the time.

pretzelman Las Vegas, Nevada USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:03 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

well...I can see this isn't going in the direction I was hoping.

But yes, I try to show myself as I really see myself, others choose to see things that aren't there.

for those who did an honest self exam...thank-you for participating.

gozoman2 Xaghra, Gozo Malta

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:05 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

>>>>>>>>> takes over mike......

One life. That's all we've got. It is a journey we might as well enjoy, since we have no other choice.

What is the point of restricting our very own soul for someone else's whims and desires?

Travel the route of discovery together yes.....

but leave my desires unfulfilled for the sake of following someone else's......NO.

Whatever the journey may bring along my path....but it is mine...

to life.

sxc666 Central Coast, New South Wales Australia

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:11 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

pretzelman: well...I can see this isn't going in the direction I was hoping.

But yes, I try to show myself as I really see myself, others choose to see things that aren't there.

for those who did an honest self exam...thank-you for participating.

Than at the end of the day ship that is all you can do.

Sorry if I got a bit off track, but I started shooting off at my mouth and it just kept going.....

I don't think any of us want to be alone. I don't think any of us want to relive the bad that we have experienced.

Therefore I think the majority of when asked 'why are you single' its because we choose to be.

I have sweet fark all I can give you materially. But I want sweet fark all materially in return.

What I have is mine. What you have is yours.

Ok ill shut up now Im starting again

druidess6308 Aliquippa, Pennsylvania USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:23 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

Starlin, I'll repeat what I've said many times on here, and you can give me that coal if you want...it doesn't change who I am. I honestly don't care about a man's looks, money, or possessions. I care about his personality...and you have tons to offer a woman in the area of heart and personality.

I have my own house, car, and all the other toys. I would be willing to share those with the right man. (We'd have to work on getting him his own car, but we'd find a solution. I need mine for work. However, we do have buses here, and a lot of things within walking distance of where I live, so he wouldn't be housebound in the meantime.)

Yes, I've already supported one husband...and a family of four, actually, at that time. It wasn't easy, we were on a tight budget, but it worked for many years. And it was his meds that changed him and broke us up because he became selfish and abusive. And I've already married one man who wasn't anything that I'd normally be attracted to physically because I loved who he was inside. And I married him legally to put him on my medical benefits, knowing that he was very ill...and nursed him through his death. So, I know what I'm saying is true because I've been there, done that. And though I might be rare, I'm not unique. There are others out there, some of whom are right here on this site. It's just a matter of finding the right one, my friend.

I understand your fears...but it's not impossible for someone to love you just the way you are, Starlin.

dcj22 Somewhere, South Dakota USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:23 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

I often wonder why someone would be interested in me after they get to know me. I'm always surprised that someone looks past the health problems, etc and still is interested in me.

sxc666 Central Coast, New South Wales Australia

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:30 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

dcj22: I often wonder why someone would be interested in me after they get to know me. I'm always surprised that someone looks past the health problems, etc and still is interested in me.

I think a lot of the time Dana, we will put ourselves down to save anyone else doing it.

lanabyte Charleston, West Virginia USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:30 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

I'm not scared, just realistic. Most women are a hell of alot prettier than me, and any man that says looks don't matter at all is a liar. Doesn't mean I don't have any confidence; just means I know my place and where I stand.

LACali Southern California, California USA

Mon Dec 22, 2008 3:32 PM CST : I'll admit it....I'm scared

pretzelman: Many have wondered why I am on a dating site, if I am not looking for a partner. I have asked myself the same question.

Although I present myself as a mean old man, there is a reason. I mean other than the fact that I am a mean old man. I am scared of relationships.

People say they want honesty...so here it is!!

When I say scared, I don't mean scared for me. I am scared for the other possible mate. I run them off(yes, believe it or not, a few have expressed interest) more to protect them from me.

But here are a few of my fears in relation to relationships.

First, and foremost is money. So self respecting woman wants a guy with no money. Now, don't tell that lie about money means nothing to you!! You'll get coal in your stocking for that!!

Health issues. I have a lot. Too much to burden any woman with. Let it go at that.

Fear of losing my independence. I like being free

Possessions...I have none. And I do mean none! No house, no car, no nothin'

Last but, not least...the physical aspect. Although many women say looks and outward appearance mean nothing, remember that coal I talked about in the beginning of this post??? Be honest,,,you wouldn't date Quasimoto!!!

I stand back and look at me, a 58 year old man. And I think, if I were a woman, would I want to get involved with this man??
A resounding....HELL NO!

So do any of you give yourself an inventory to see why a person should want you as a partner??? Or do you only see good in yourselves and believe a person is crazy not to want you??Serious answers, please. I want to hear about YOU, not what I think of myself. Do YOU do an honest assessment of yourself?

O.K>...now I will shut my "mangina"

Beautiful post. Many of us on here have health, financial, family and other problems. My problem is that men don't want to see that part of me or deal with it and I'm tired of pretending that it doesn't exist. I've found that I've kind of gone into a shell so that I don't have to meet anyone's expectations. When I tell them things they blow it off in the beginning and say it doesn't matter but then very soon it does and I'm tired of being hurt so I understand everything you've written.

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