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Children should not dictate that a couple stays together...

Not a healthy, positive and nurturing enviro if the couple are not getting on.

... lets see how you are feeling when your wife has traded you in..

Most parents love their children more than anything.. so putting their kids at the forefront of their decision making is a pretty reasonable thing to do in my estimation.. also, according to my observations.. marriages that overcome and endure challenges are the strongest and most loving..

Look at where he is from. Those mid-eastren countries are women oppressors. They fear the independant nature of Western women. Western women have become educated. If they so choose, they don't need men in their lives. This man hates that. He wants to control and dominate women. It is obvious through his comments, women are second class citizens. Nothing more than a dog or slave. WAKE UP PAL, IT'S THE 21st CENTURY! NOT ANCIENT ROME. The anger and hatred you feel for your neihbors started thousands of years ago. Isn't it time to let it go? The way you feel about women is archaic. Catch up with us buddy!

So if a man beats his wife black and blue she should stay for the sake of the kids????

Tamarin seriously.... should be judge all situations by this standard...not ALL breakups are as a result of domestic violence... of course if their is violence in the home.. get out quick!!!.. I don't see that situation as the norm... many relationships struggle.. couples will have challenges, hard times, they might get bored, the passion might wane a little.. this is not a reason to throw in the towel in my estimation... this should be the time when you fight for ur marriage... (those I know who did are reaping the rewards of perseverance)...if their is domestic violence it would be in the kids interest to get out quick...

Right but you (as I) look for the best in people.

I see the majority of the posts states "do not stay together for the children".

The thread author never mentions staying together for children. My intrepretation of his post was that eventually they're just gonna want a new model cause they're sick of the one they got. Which would follow the path that this poster seems to revisit frequently.

Perhaps his word "Parents" lends everyone to assume he meant for the kids sake?

Perhaps I misunderstood?

Hell no!!!!!! She should do like a friend of mine did.. .357, one shot, right thru the heart..

True story, she was charged with Murder 1 and got off because of self defense..

I see the majority of the posts states "do not stay together for the children".

The thread author never mentions staying together for children. My intrepretation of his post was that eventually they're just gonna want a new model cause they're sick of the one they got. Which would follow the path that this poster seems to revisit frequently.

Perhaps his word "Parents" lends everyone to assume he meant for the kids sake?

Perhaps I misunderstood?[/quote]

Perhaps..........

Could be

Am I supposed to jump in the hole? Okay, let me get a running start.......



Oh oh, missed the hole!

back at cha

I so agree. Having just seperated after 20 years and 3 lovely kids... since the seperation the kids have been fine. They have adjusted. They will never always be happy that mum and dad are not together anymore.. but it is much better for me and my wife that this happened because of the damage it was doing to our children. No more arguments. The kids not trying to feel responsible for having to keep mmum and dad together.

The children take priority in terms of their happiness.

Going seperate ways is sometimes inevitable and indicates that the partners have long outgrown each other. I was so unhappy in my marriage and since the split I am fine. The ex is taking time getting used to it. But as i said the kids are doing well. They do not need a toxic relatinship to imprint on them that what is what partners do as normal.

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I respect your opinion.

They don't need to stay married forever but its nice if they stay friends. I'm friends with mine and NEITHER of us has a copy of our divorce decree. Kids stay with me for school and most of the time when not in school go with mom. We have no set times and always call and compromise. Preference goes to the parent with out of town trips.

The only disadvantage is we are all good friends - my law sign is still on her dental office and even 7 years after the divorce many think we are still married.

Why? on my part its because I do divorces and see so many rotten people use their kids as weapons. I also know we were opposites and though opposites attract -they don't too often get along. On her side she doesn't like to fight, she's smart and happy with our arrangement and also knows I'm a somewhat bad-tempered attorney lol

its stupid to stay together if u are unhappy weather u have children or not.

Ok.. what are we talking about here? It doesn't sound like your saying stay together for the sake of the kids... it sounds like your saying... hey, get married and when you get sick of each other, trade each other in and start over? Is that what I am reading?

I do agree that if things are not working out, don't stay together for the kids. They will be happier if their parents are happy apart than miserable together.

But if your saying "trade her in" like a new car.... then don't bother getting married. Just live with someone and don't make the committment. Be sure to be honest about your intentions up front before someone thinks they are committing themselves to a life time partner instead of a 2 year lease.