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I think it's best for the man to travel for the first meeting. Any woman who travels to meet a man for the first time should be extremely careful and take every precaution you can. Stay in a hotel and don't let him know which room, have your own transportation, don't let him pick you up from the airport, and make sure you have enough cash if you have to bail quickly. I know from experience; you can't be too careful. If he really cares for you, then he'll want you to be careful and not get upset about it.

Am in the process of going through this. He will come here and we will meet in a public, neutral place, like the coffee shop on Campus, then go from there depending on how well we interact in person. From there, I have no clue, except to say it wil be first things first.

We have discussed our preferences for life in email, phone, Im and chat. Even though, through these mediums, we are perfectly compatible, the reall test is the in person meeting and to properly date after meeting. jmo

Just adding my two cents worth to the discussion. I tried arranging a meeting this year with someone I had met online about two years ago. Sadly he bailed out on me, we still talk almsot everyday but its frustrating, he says he's interested in going to the next level and I am too but all the talk, IM and e-mails in the world can't seal the deal of compatability until you finally meet.

Some are comfortable with the shield of a computer screen in front of them but if you are going to be serious your gonna have to meet at some point and see how it goes. I have a young kid so I would prefer the first meeting to be with them at a hotel, we could meet go out to dinner and spend time getting to know each other better face to face. I would not want the pressure on me that something physical has to happen, I am not saying it would not, just that I think first meetings should be about soul searching and seeing if there really is a basis for a future relationship.

I had one to visit me from out of the country. This was after 6 weeks of talking, etc. We didn't stay together on that visit. When I visited his country I stayed with him (4 months of talking, chatting, etc.). It only last 2 more months after that and there were no more visits. Since then have found that this is a regular activity of this person. Big lesson I learned.

Nemaste. My thoughts, exactly. That is why I have continuously said Pending how we get along. For me that can take much more than one meeting.

Also for me, sex is a long way off. I have never gotten sexual on a first date. Te earliest with my late husband and later with my ex-fiance was after 3 to 4 months of dating.

He is aware of this and accepts my views. Guys that cannot, wold have a hard time getting to know me if they put that kind of pressure on me. I tend to withdraw from them under those circumstances.