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pubwrite08: I have run my own daycare for twenty years, still do. In 1999 one of my oldest sons friends hung around us alot, he had to be in the ninth grade. Anyway his Mother says, I am going to the Bahamas for a week can you watch Marcus send him to school, and just look out for him. I alway provide services like these they bring in big cash.
Anyway a week goes by no word from her. So I drive over there and nobody is there. I Bring Marcus the kid back he has a key to his house we open the door, and nothing is there except for his stuff.
So I have my other kids with us, and we get everything Marcus wants out of his house. And we bring it to my house. To make a long story short she never came back for him. She tried to bond with him later.
He visits her now he is 22, but he said she is so mad at him for calling me Momma. She brings this up to me every holiday, and it is getting old. I hold my tongue for his sake, I am nice, but I swear I want to give her a fat lip every year. I was born and raised in the extremely rough parts of Washington DC. I am losing my patience with her.
She tries to tell me how rough it was for her to hold on to him and her man. Everytime she say it, I want to knock her down. lol She just came by just now, and said I appreciate all you have done for him, but it hurts when he calls you Momma in my presence, can you talk to him. Why can't she be grateful he does not hate her, and neither do I. Yeah she left me with an extra mouth to feed, but I love my Marcus, he is a six foot five inch clutz, and breaks everything he slightly touches. He does not laugh he giggles, and it is cute as hell to me.
I do not care if he call me Momma, Miss Wendy, as long as it is respectful, why can't she be grateful I did not throw him away like she did?

buzzy: Pubwrite, You got the best out of that whole situation, you got to love Marcus, and he in turn loves you. What does bio-mom get? A son that does not love her, who is angry with her. A at one time friend who is angry with her. Besides all that quilt, fear and anger she already carries around with her. Look into her eyes and you will see it. Concentrate on the good you got out of that whole affair, forgive easily. Your happiness and health will improve. I admire you for the strenght and courage you show. Those are the things Marcus has learned from you. Would he have learned them from bio-mom?

Sommerauer71: Ah Pub.
Beautiful story. As for the natural mother, I feel for her, more than I do for Marcus.

See, Marcus has you, your wonderful way of expressing yourself, your love for him that shines through.

While she, has none of that, I feel deeply for people who are unable to love properly, when it brings so much joy to our lives.

I do hope he can forgive her, sometimes, when people are not shown love then they have no idea how to, and this is cleat that this lady did not.

She needs help and compassion, not scorn.

I too have a similar situation, a child that I took on when he was 9, not identical, my situation was different, but still, here I am 8 years later, with a child that is not my own, but is.

Who is belanced, happy, who I have encouraged to see his natural mother, simply because I believe they both deserve to at least give it a try.

You are a wonderful person, thank you for sharing that.

kidaling: It is of course not popular to show compassion for the "DEAD BEAT MOM" , but its nice to see. We are so quick to crucifixion.
I , like everyone else here admire you Pubwrite for what you've done, You proved your compassion with Marcus but you also showed it for the mom. I'm glad this was pointed out...

pubwrite08: I have run my own daycare for twenty years, still do. In 1999 one of my oldest sons friends hung around us alot, he had to be in the ninth grade. Anyway his Mother says, I am going to the Bahamas for a week can you watch Marcus send him to school, and just look out for him. I alway provide services like these they bring in big cash.
Anyway a week goes by no word from her. So I drive over there and nobody is there. I Bring Marcus the kid back he has a key to his house we open the door, and nothing is there except for his stuff.
So I have my other kids with us, and we get everything Marcus wants out of his house. And we bring it to my house. To make a long story short she never came back for him. She tried to bond with him later.
He visits her now he is 22, but he said she is so mad at him for calling me Momma. She brings this up to me every holiday, and it is getting old. I hold my tongue for his sake, I am nice, but I swear I want to give her a fat lip every year. I was born and raised in the extremely rough parts of Washington DC. I am losing my patience with her.
She tries to tell me how rough it was for her to hold on to him and her man. Everytime she say it, I want to knock her down. lol She just came by just now, and said I appreciate all you have done for him, but it hurts when he calls you Momma in my presence, can you talk to him. Why can't she be grateful he does not hate her, and neither do I. Yeah she left me with an extra mouth to feed, but I love my Marcus, he is a six foot five inch clutz, and breaks everything he slightly touches. He does not laugh he giggles, and it is cute as hell to me.
I do not care if he call me Momma, Miss Wendy, as long as it is respectful, why can't she be grateful I did not throw him away like she did?