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LOL Mark!

I forgot......I do things behind the forums. Sometimes I send someone an email, flower or ecard that I think needs to be encouraged. That's about all I'm guilt of.

You are well respected for just that young lady and a most welcome breath of fresh air to boot.
As for the medium being tough it does have a rather decidedly two dimensional aspect at times (One dimensional from the trolls sadly) with no means for inflection or context to properly be situated but those with persistence can manage. Brail has no working in my underdeveloped mind but works for those with the grace to understand and even here we learn more and more every day.

I ask myself how many people here actually work or do have a life outside CS.

Actually it´s quite sad IMO. CS should be an alternative means of finding a partner or making friends, not the be all. A night out on the forum when you have nothing better to do is great fun, but for me pales in comparison with a night out with friends.

Real life is much more fulfilling and exciting, if it weren´t, why are so many people searching here for the means to live it with a significant other?

Am not sure the point of your thread as IMO people who do this would not necessarily post that they would do this.

Talkin about myself, yes I sometimes intercede if I see insulting or unfair accusations, and not just against people who I might consider friends. Sometimes I would do it in a light hearted way and sometimes I would say it out straight, but I would never be swayed by e-mails from people.........not that it has happened. I also would never telephone or e-mail anyone for their support or to advise them what to do.

I think it takes a large learning curve for most people to communicate in this way and some of the behaviour I see is unnacceptable, and I think that if we were all at a function face to face, most of it would not happen. It is easy to hide behind our computer sometimes.

JMO

Completely Agree Jan.

Mark, do you really expect to learn more than you do so by simply observing forums?

It does exist and it is not attractive (to say the least).
But when people are lonely and bored, it's their only means of having some excitement in their lives, some sense of belonging and control.

They do have this need hence they fulfill it. Period.

"Does it help or aggravate"
Are you being serious?

Not really unless something is very upsetting and only then with one or two people I trust. Maybe others do it (I don't know since not many have done this with me) but I try and keep this as a site to meet people either for friendship or more. The gossip stuff goes on in real life and not too interesting.

I guess I am in the dark. I don't know of outsie networks, nor to I care. I am here to meet someone who is on this site. If they exist, let them if it makes them happy. We each have our own agenda.

Laura, as you know (or perhaps not?) by now I am not very serious even when I am serious here and often when I am completely not serious I am often more serious than it would at first seem. I am interested in the complexities of human commerce. The idea of communication is very intriguing and the means and methods of doing this increase in ways that compound our ability to deal with things.
Is there any merit to emailing a person whom you know is going through a rough patch that has just faced a vicious assault that perhaps might not have the same weight if they had received it in a better time?
There is no need to drag a crowd to watch anything that occurs in the forums as there is in truth nothing here but words but words can and do harm and heal. The opportunity for the invisible hatred inside of sad and lonely people often rises to a point where those undeserving of such attention receive more than any person's fair share.
Likewise a note that could profoundly lift a spirit could be noted and pointed out to someone who has not had the opportunity to see it because they were away at work, with family or otherwise indisposed.
In these cases I applaud the friends who support each other.
I do agree that far too often the opportunity to direct responses is activated through these back-door outlets and most often as you say by those in dire need of hobbies or some form of life expression. To those I am fearful for their ability to remain viable in any sort of real life relationship as they will never completely function without their support groups and a relationship is a private issue between two people not a horde who can only complicate things.
I learn from everything my brain has the opportunity to input. Some of it is good and some of it not so good. Even in the bad there is always a lesson. My father for example was not a man I would wish upon anyone. Yet from him I learned how not to be a man or a father. It is all in the way we choose to handle the information I suppose.

Weren't you in aerospace? Having grown up in a community of aerospace engineers somehow I don't think there's much gossip among them....not a real gossipy group. I'm sure you know what I mean.

Well I have been talking about you (California Girl) for a week.

But I think it was in the forums not gossiping to your friends. Somehow I don't see you that way.

Hey maybe I don't have any friends!!!

That I know for a fact is untrue.

Maybe if you were my friend I would have one!!!

I use the mail box but refuse to gossip, so far have not had a problem with that on here.
I hope and pray, that when I say something and the receiver does not understand the message, that this person feels free enough to ask me; What do you mean?
It is good to give a person that opportunity to explain.
Sometimes not being able to see the recipient can be misunderstood as something can be writen with a smile but not received that way as it can not be seen.
Also it depends at times of your private message send, of the mood the recipient is in.
Unlike in a phone call where you can more easily tell and ask.
So far no one from CS has my phone number except one person.

Check your friends request. It's a start.

I had someone the other night post comments in a Thread from one of my emails to her. I find tht horrible! It really turned me off the person.