In response to: Scientists tell us love is all in our mind or brain, based on a chemical reaction fueled by chemicals. When two people are attracted to each other, a virtual explosion of adrenaline-like nuerochemicals gush forth. Fireworks explode and we see stars. Some of you may experience something a little different but it’s your unique way of being smitten.
Singles search for love armed with a list of qualities desired in a mate/lover, such as honesty, fidelity, loyalty, sense of humor, intelligence, warmth, etc. Yet when that person appears they say, he/she is a really nice person, but nothing clicked, just no "chemistry."
Some people become veritable love junkies. They need chemistry or this chemical excitement to feel happy about and intoxicated by life. Once this initial rush of chemicals wanes (inevitable after six months to three years, depending on the individual and the circumstances), their relationship crumbles. They're soon off again, seeking a quick fix to their forlorn feelings: another chemical high from infatuation.
So is this why so many of us are still here on CS? Do we place too much value on the chemistry rather than the other things that we believe are so important in a mate? Could we possibly find that person and have the chemistry follow if we gave it some time?
I met a good friend through an ad online I was really just commenting on his writing but we corresponded and he was into being very active and I was at a place in my life to go out and do things that I hadn't before. We met simply to be friends.Well we ended up as more and over time the chemistry grew withing a period of a month I fell for him that was a year and a half ago and I still love him.
Sometimes you are smitten instantly of course there has to be some attraction there for there to be chemistry but sometimes it builds if given a chance.JMO