Fun or Long-Term

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Jan1305 Sunshine and vino, Murcia Spain
Tue Jan 6, 2009 3:24 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
What are we really looking for?

I mean those of us who have been in long-term relationships, marriages, whatever. However, young uns please contribute!

Personally, after a long marriage I am enjoying more and more the single life, but I still feel there is somethimg missing. This does not seem to be the case for friends of mine, younger and older, who remain single, but interestingly have never been married, or in a long( I mean LONG) relationship, and who have never had kids.

I have no agenda in so far as providing a father figure for my kids, they have long since flown the nest, and I have never been of that mindset that children need both a father and mother rile model in order to survive, so that brings me closer to these friends of mine without kids.

I really don´t know if it´s down to conditioning, i.e. men and women need a significant other, or because I was with the same man from the age of 16 to 43 years old.

I have more than made up for the lack of experience however since my divorce!

Sometimes I think I want somebody in my life, a monogamous relationship. but only if we can be together for the weekends!
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sweetowen Somewhere, Pennsylvania USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 3:37 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I'm not sure. As you said, I'm not looking for a "father figure" for my daughter, because she's grown. It'd be nice to have someone, I'm feeling more & more lately. Not that I don't have friends... I've got plenty of things to do. It's just that it's been 3 years since my last relationship & I think I'm soon ready for a new one.
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Big_John Ocean Springs, Mississippi USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:20 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I want to have fun in a long term relationship. Sharing your life with someone is wonderful. I need that!
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mbcasey North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:27 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Would like to get married someday...grin
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jlw45 duncanville, Texas USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:28 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
i'm looking for some long term fun...........professor

rolling on the floor laughing
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jvaski south lake tahoe, California USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:30 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
jlw45: i'm looking for some long term fun...........


Now then , Why is that too much to ask for ? help
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hopefloats Slim's Lady, Tennessee USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:39 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
My kids are almost out of the nest. And I'm ready for the next chapter of my life, so to speak. I've devoted my life to putting my kids first and foremost above my singleness after the divorce. I've had one short term relationship in 13yrs. But that was because he was a scammer. I'd like to think and still have the hope that I will be able to find love again...........if not, I've been one blessed lady anyway.
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Shirley49WV Mason Co, West Virginia USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:44 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
My kids left the nest a few years ago. And now it is time for me to have the fun which I have been doing. I do not need a man to make me complete as many other women have said. I simple want the one that connects with me on all levels. Is that to much to ask for?
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zeelanderer Louisville, Kentucky USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:46 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I beleive there is no such thing as long term anymore.... gimme some short term fun any day.

zee
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Beethovenfan West County St. Louis , Missouri USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:54 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I would like long term...and If I find someone, I hope he is willing to get off all of the sites too, so I will need his pwds...rolling on the floor laughing
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druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 4:58 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I've had my share of short, fun relationships in my life as well as more than my share of short, miserable marriages. I would like to find a long term relationship with someone who really loves me for me, and who I feel the same way about. I had that, but it turned out to be all too short a time before he died. I'd love to find it again, and have it last a lot longer.

wine
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cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
Tue Jan 6, 2009 5:05 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
jlw45: i'm looking for some long term fun...........


Cleverthumbs up
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Ever_Hopeful Bury, Greater Manchester, England UK
Tue Jan 6, 2009 5:13 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Big_John: I want to have fun in a long term relationship. Sharing your life with someone is wonderful. I need that!


I couldnt agree more, I would like to meet someone who is my best friend as well as my lover.

I dont want a man to live with, I want one I cannot live without
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Big_John Ocean Springs, Mississippi USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:19 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Ever_Hopeful: I couldnt agree more, I would like to meet someone who is my best friend as well as my lover.

I dont want a man to live with, I want one I cannot live without


Having sex and being with your best friend is about as good as it gets. I want my heart to hurt when I am away from her! wave
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druidess6308 Reverse, Pennsylvania USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:22 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Ever_Hopeful: I couldnt agree more, I would like to meet someone who is my best friend as well as my lover.

I dont want a man to live with, I want one I cannot live without
wine Exactly. rose
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Tater springfield, Illinois USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:27 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
I'm looking for long term, have no interest jumping aroun...JMOcheers
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Dknew Lee, New Hampshire USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:33 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Both grin
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Abram Goshen, Ohio USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:34 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Looking for life partner that truthfully is looking for the same. Some who loves me for me.
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Jan1305 Sunshine and vino, Murcia Spain
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:38 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
Thanks for the replies folks, but nobody has really responded as I expected.

Firstly, I´m not pondering whether fun or long term is the best alernative. We are all at different points in our lives, thus have different needs. Neither of these lifestyle choices is under debate.

My question was about how we have lived our lives, i.e. married, with kids etc...and how this affects what we ultimately yearn for, or feel is the accepted option in later life when a long-term relationship/marriage breaks down.

My views seem to differ with my RL friends, older and younger who have not had a long marriage or children like me.
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mindfful London Chicago, Illinois USA
Tue Jan 6, 2009 7:55 PM CST : Fun or Long-Term
jlw45: i'm looking for some long term fun...........


exactly

are they mutually exclusive?

i stayed single til i became convinced i could have both


hiiiii jan!wave
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