man must pay for twins

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thopkins St.Pauls Bay, Majjistral Malta
Sommerauer71: But it is not taken into account Cris.

Clearly, the judge has ordered that he pay for children that are not his.

Unfairly.

Case closed, one that I do not agree with.
There aint a godamm thing I could do about it, but it makes a great discussion.

There is no way that I, would want money off a man who was proven not to be the father of my children. I would not be able to take it, in fact, I would not even have taken it to court.


that very fair of you Sommers, and I think any decent person with the slightest level of integrity would do the same



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
thopkins: The retroactivity question is very open, because it has to be assumed all the time that he did not know that those were not his children, in which case he was cheated...but I doubt that any court will give him anything. Also because probably she does not have the money anyway!!

The second part of your comment has things which, in my opinion, should not bear on the final decision. Whether the wife was of a bad character or not, or in turn if he was a bad character does not change facts...either he is or he is not the father. The only situation which might bear on the judgement is if she had the children before they were married, and he knew that she had such children from another unknown guy, and he accepted to marry her and take care of everyone. Only then would he not be allowed to walk out scotch free from the marriage and abandon his responsibilities....on the basis that his wife could have found another supporter, or made other arrangements at the time of marriage.


Absolutely.

It also depends on the circumstances surrounding him taking the test, was he misled into believing they were his children?

If he took the test voluntarily, why was he suspicious that they were not his?

The facts are scant here, we are only speculating.




Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Vido1: Many discussions and tears could be saved if they would make it as a normal procedure after birth to test the parents DNA to confirm their stATUS and avoid any further discussions. But it needs political input, and I haven't seen any intelligent politician since decades - they all extinct.


Nice, how will that help in a trusting relationship?

thopkins St.Pauls Bay, Majjistral Malta
Vido1: Many discussions and tears could be saved if they would make it as a normal procedure after birth to test the parents DNA to confirm their stATUS and avoid any further discussions. But it needs political input, and I haven't seen any intelligent politician since decades - they all extinct.


that simly assumes that all partners are actively sleeping around and not keeping count!! It would be a true invasion of marriage. When you do not trust her, leave her!!
cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
Sommer,

This is like the discussion about adoption after the biological father had abandoned the mother at birth and then years after he grows up and claims his parenthood, when the kid is happy with his/her step father who adopted him/her. It it was that black and white, there would not be extensive cases of this matter. Or you don't have it in England?



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
thopkins: that simly assumes that all partners are actively sleeping around and not keeping count!! It would be a true invasion of marriage. When you do not trust her, leave her!!


It is crap is what it is, I make no bones about that.

I went through a massive residency case with my ex husband, because he fought for his children, when we split, not because he knew I would not take care of them, but because there was a significant amount of money involved and if he had them, then he would not have to pay me.

It resulted in my children being torn between us, something that I shamfacedly admit to being a party to and scars that are deep and painful, but never, never, would I have denied him his children, nor did he question who was the father.

A woman knows who is the father of her child or children and any woman that brings a child into the world and does not know who that father is, should not have the gift of them in the first place.

So Vido, your suggestion is one of the utmost insults I have ever read about marriage and what goes on in one.

Honestly, I could have screamed when I read that.



cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
cristina: Sommer,

This is like the discussion about adoption after the biological father had abandoned the mother at birth and then years after he grows up and claims his parenthood, when the kid is happy with his/her step father who adopted him/her. It it was that black and white, there would not be extensive cases of this matter. Or you don't have it in England?


IF it was that black & white*
Conrad73 Lonesome Town Zurich, Zrich Switzerland
That Judge must have had a little Nip that morning,sure not an Action of a "Sober Judge".doh
cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
Conrad73: That Judge must have had a little Nip that morning,sure not an Action of a "Sober Judge".


Get all the elements right...if not, try to find reaosns why he judged this way!tongue



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
cristina: Sommer,

This is like the discussion about adoption after the biological father had abandoned the mother at birth and then years after he grows up and claims his parenthood, when the kid is happy with his/her step father who adopted him/her. It it was that black and white, there would not be extensive cases of this matter. Or you don't have it in England?


Hi Cris.

No, it is nothing like that at all.

That is a different kettle of fish, there are laws that protect adopted children in the UK. And laws that protect the birth parents.

I have an adopted child, who is in touch with his birth parents, their financial responsibility, is voluntary.


This case is so far off adoptive children, it is not even questionable.

Unless, the man, and this is a slim chance, that he legally adopted those twins at the onset of the relationship.

And that does not look likely, given that he has had a test to determine that he is not the biological father.


Conrad73 Lonesome Town Zurich, Zrich Switzerland
Vido1: Many discussions and tears could be saved if they would make it as a normal procedure after birth to test the parents DNA to confirm their stATUS and avoid any further discussions. But it needs political input, and I haven't seen any intelligent politician since decades - they all extinct.
Man,you really surprise me sometimes.wave








doh doh confused



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Conrad73: That Judge must have had a little Nip that morning,sure not an Action of a "Sober Judge".


Yep, Conrad.

I agree.

If this judgement was made, in view of what we have been furnished with, then it is a poor judgement and does not bode well for our male species.

cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
Sommerauer71: Hi Cris.

No, it is nothing like that at all.

That is a different kettle of fish, there are laws that protect adopted children in the UK. And laws that protect the birth parents.

I have an adopted child, who is in touch with his birth parents, their financial responsibility, is voluntary. This case is so far off adoptive children, it is not even questionable.

Unless, the man, and this is a slim chance, that he legally adopted those twins at the onset of the relationship.

And that does not look likely, given that he has had a test to determine that he is not the biological father.


No it is not different since there is not only one kind of adoption. Absolute adoption and relative adoption. In the relative adoption, contacts with biological parents are kept...this doesn't happen in full adoption. I'm sure you have that differenciation as well in England.
Vido1: Many discussions and tears could be saved if they would make it as a normal procedure after birth to test the parents DNA to confirm their stATUS and avoid any further discussions. But it needs political input, and I haven't seen any intelligent politician since decades - they all extinct.


Gawd! Are you for real???



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
cristina: No it is not different since there is not only one kind of adoption. Absolute adoption and relative adoption. In the relative adoption, contacts with biological parents are kept...this doesn't happen in full adoption. I'm sure you have that differenciation as well in England.


There are two adoptions.

Cris.

One where the birth mother gives up her child for adoption.

The child goes to foster parents for the first six weeks of its life, adoptive parents are chosen by an agency that is governed by adoption law. The child is placed with the adoptive parents, at six weeks old.

The court will offer a temporary paper for six months, that will give the birth mother a chance to change her mind if she so wishes, there will be a final hearing when the child is around nine months old, where the birth mother will sign the papers to agree to giving up her rights as that child's mother.

Then there is the adoption process, of where a man can adopt a woman's children that he knows are not his, they get married, he AGREES to take them as his own, couret proceedings begin, the natural father, if he is available has to agree, if not available, and there is no contact, then the case will usually go through.

Where, in this case, is that similar?

This man, had a test to determine whether these twins were his, nowhere has there been any mention of adoption.

It is totally different, if a birth father comes back into an adopted child's life, it cannot be until that child is of a certian age, when he is an adult, and can decide for himself.

Sorry Cris, is is not similar.

The man had a test, which proved the children were not his, he has been ordered to pay, regardless of the marriage, the children, he has been ordered to pay for children that are not his.

And you say that is fair?

I do not think so, when in one sentence, that has happened.




Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Karma3: Gawd! Are you for real???


Unfortunately Karma, he is.

I need a lawyer in here, where is Sexy when you need her?



Vido1 Khobar Saudi Arabia
Sommerauer71: Nice, how will that help in a trusting relationship?


A lot! Look at reasons for divorce: There are many couples, married for years and having kids together, and suddenly there is this mistrust and the question very often arrises: Is this child actually from me.

I don't know about the US, but in the German TV there are many "shows", where couples or ex-couples have their fatherhood officially proved or disproved. Many marriages went appart because of this! And if this would be cleared right in the beginning, both sides will benifit from it!

I also do understand that especially women are against it, coz it only proves that they did wrong!
thopkins St.Pauls Bay, Majjistral Malta
I see this case as clear as crystal!! Put the responsibility where it is due...give to Caeser...etc. The man should simply not have been ordered to pay!!

Maybe the judge confused sentiments with rights
thopkins St.Pauls Bay, Majjistral Malta
what an embarassment!! excuse me wife do you mind me checking if that child is mine?? How silly can we get? Obviously the father always can ask for a test if he is in doubt, but then he should test his relation with his wife first
cristina Lisbon, Groningen Netherlands
Sommer,

The foolish thing about both of us is that we are standing in different perspectives, different principles (apparently). You are from a common system, i'm from a civil system. That makes a different analisis. Nevertheless, Canada being from common system, it seems like the judge in this case proferred my thinking. Anyway, it is always stupid to be certain about a judgment without having all the elements on the table. I'm sure that common system- UK mainly doesn't analise things just as black and white. The prove of that is that the apparent same cases can be judged in very different ways. You, the outsiders might thing that they are indeed similar, but all the nuances are taken into account on the final judgment, always, no matter if it common or civil law..., thus, we will simply burn here honey!
I'd love to find a case judged in England where it was the same way as it was in Canada. I'll do my best to find one. I'm not sure whether it will be today because i have an interesting event to attendbatting but, oh, i'm curious about this alledged balck and white solution...which is not like that...i swear!

Gotta run now, really!

gift




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