If My Body Were A Car

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sassy49senior Itty Bitty, Nebraska USA

If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking
about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps, dents
and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a
little dull, but that's not the worst of it. My headlights
are out of focus and it;s especially hard to see things up
close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip
slide, skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.
My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me
hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns
inefficiently. But here's the worst of it :

Almost Everytime I Sneeze, Cough Or Sputter...

Either My Radiator Leaks Or My Exhaust Backfires
curefan mount olive, Mississippi USA
sassy49senior: If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking
about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps, dents
and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a
little dull, but that's not the worst of it. My headlights
are out of focus and it;s especially hard to see things up
close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip
slide, skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.
My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me
hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns
inefficiently. But here's the worst of it :

Almost Everytime I Sneeze, Cough Or Sputter...

Either My Radiator Leaks Or My Exhaust Backfires
sassy you shouldnt think that wayhug



solitare Munchen, Bayern Germany
sassy49senior: If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking
about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps, dents
and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a
little dull, but that's not the worst of it. My headlights
are out of focus and it;s especially hard to see things up
close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip
slide, skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.
My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me
hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns
inefficiently. But here's the worst of it :

Almost Everytime I Sneeze, Cough Or Sputter...

Either My Radiator Leaks Or My Exhaust Backfires


I heard something similar from George Carlin many years ago; it was, as he said, all nothing that a good 'Lube Job' couldn't fix!laugh
wixomwizard Wixom, Michigan USA
I'd drive you too the west coast and back???rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing Just kidding.hug
sassy49senior Itty Bitty, Nebraska USA
wixomwizard: I'd drive you too the west coast and back??? Just kidding.




Hey Wixy for this beat up old car that would be a
compliment. wink
Dawn7z Denver, Colorado USA
In response to: If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking
about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps, dents
and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a
little dull, but that's not the worst of it. My headlights
are out of focus and it;s especially hard to see things up
close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip
slide, skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.
My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me
hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns
inefficiently. But here's the worst of it :

Almost Everytime I Sneeze, Cough Or Sputter...

Either My Radiator Leaks Or My Exhaust Backfires


That is freaking funny Sassy. I always compared myself to my little beat up Pontiac Sunbird it had hail damage and a bit hole in the fiberglass on the hood and dents on both car doors, but it still had get up and go. I think that care is still running but is now in car heaven.angel rolling on the floor laughing teddybear


You are fine just the way you are don't be wishing for something different you put in work to earn those beauty marks.
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
Dawn7z: That is freaking funny Sassy. I always compared myself to my little beat up Pontiac Sunbird it had hail damage and a bit hole in the fiberglass on the hood and dents on both car doors, but it still had get up and go. I think that care is still running but is now in car heaven. You are fine just the way you are don't be wishing for something different you put in work to earn those beauty marks.

Sorry ladies I would have to be a mack truck cuse theres a big engine under my hood.rolling on the floor laughing
Dawn7z Denver, Colorado USA
loverboy690: Sorry ladies I would have to be a mack truck cuse theres a big engine under my hood.



Such humility.
rolling on the floor laughing



queensguy2468 Rego Park, New York USA
Actually i think i would take you to a truck derby and finish you off. rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
Dawn7z: Such humility.

Watch your fingers though the hood sometimes sticksrolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
wixomwizard Wixom, Michigan USA
Dawn7z: Such humility.


Me thinks he kissed the blarney stone one too many times.head banger
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
queensguy2468: Actually i think i would take you to a truck derby and finish you off.

why is that?dunno
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
wixomwizard: Me thinks he kissed the blarney stone one too many times.

in the words of elvis Don't be cruel
xoredheadxo Richwood, West Virginia USA
I would be in the junk yard dunno
kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
xoredheadxo: I would be in the junk yard

i would be right there with you
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
kissmedeeply: i would be right there with you

don't worry it's easy to throw a rodrolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
loverboy690: don't worry it's easy to throw a rod


Oh how i feelllll the loveeeelaugh
loverboy690 East Jordan, Michigan USA
kissmedeeply: Oh how i feelllll the loveeee

Yeah I need some polishing
kissmedeeply Petitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada
loverboy690: Yeah I need some polishing



i am just having some fun..handshake
wixomwizard Wixom, Michigan USA
kissmedeeply: i would be right there with you


I'm a infamous junk collector.rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing




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