Sad but true, some men don't know how to emotionally connect with anyone, including women. Unfortunately, some also were raised according to such a double standard that they can't countenance (distinquish between) sex and affection in the same package. Many men want to emotionally connect with a woman, and to connect with their own children, but it's also true that many don't know how to be vulnerable, which is what intimacy demands.
They're often caught in a bind, wanting more emotional depth to their lives but not knowing how to get it because boys are taught from a young age that emotional stuff is girls' stuff. Truth is, emotional stuff is human being stuff. What's a poor woman to do?
First and most important-choose the right guy. Someone with whom you establish a conversation and rapport before you jump into bed (very important for you guys to know). And then recognize that men often do express affection though sex. Further, the closeness they feel after sex presents a great opportunity for conversation that contains the "emotional exchange" so satisfying to women (and to men, too). But women sometimes demand too much emotional (talk) from men. Women need to (recognize) that men often express affection best through actions (changing a light bulb, fixing the VCR) rather than words.