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Mz. Shadow,

I truely (missy? is this a word? :) ) understand how you feel. I've had my pic in defferent singles sites, and I'm constantly ignored.

True, the body can be changed, the personality can be changed, all of it is changeable. It just depends on how determnind you are.

Thing is though, and I mention this in other forums. There has to be some kind of attraction, WHATEVER IT MIGHT be, for something to happen. Might be looks, might be a swagger, might be how someone handles themselves.

Heck, I'm overweight too. I'm looking to change that. If I find someone that I like, that can stand to lose a few lbs., and wants to have someone to work with to accomplish those same goals... then GREAT! We might have that and other things in common too.

I have to admit: The whole "BBW" thing has really gone out of proportion. I'm gonna be blunt here. Please bear with me. FAT IS FAT. FAT IS NOT BEAUTIFUL. I can understand where there's a health issue, and you just can't lose the weight, that there might be a problem. But ya gotta understand, most people are not really attracted to that ( those with the BBW fetishes, well.. they need some help too ) be it guy or gal.

The flip side of this coin is that most women will only want that "tall, handsome guy, with the washboard abs.... etc... " What do you say to those that will not waver in their opinion either? I actually read an ad some time ago about the BBW that was looking for a guy that could " see all of his parts " ( I almost fell out of my chair when I read that ) FOR SHAME.... that BBW probably doesn't take care of herself, yet she WANTS THE GUY OF HER DREAMS. What makes you think that this "guy of her dreams" will consider her "attractive" ?

Ah well... it's 2a and I need to stop ranting here... but I think you get my point :)

Ron V.

Sorry, this is a sore point with me :) And don't get me wrong, I'm not like, 200 pounds, just heavier than I'd like to be. I would hope that a man would look to see what's INSIDE, and not be so shallow as to look only on the outside, then stop looking. As I stated in a previous post, I do not look at the outside, except if he has horns coming out of his head or 3 eyes... it's what's inside that counts!! I have to admit that I've never seen an ad from a woman that says "rock hard abs, killer butt, and legs that won't quit".. doesn't mean they're probably not there, just that I've never seen one. I disagree with your statement that "most women only want that 'tall handsome guy...'. That just isn't true. If I man has integrity, intelligence, a sense of humor, that's what counts!!

I seriously understand what you are talking about... I'm a heavy guy myself... I know I have something to offer that "right" person, but people take a look at my pic... and well... I don't get many responses to my ads around either.

Oh I wouldn't let it worry you none.

It's just a matter of respect.

Some folks like tall, or short, or fat, or thin, or young or old.

They like what they like. Sex appeal is primal, it is what it is.

Just respect **their** choice for slim women and focus on the men who like larger women.

Everybody's happy. Nobody gets hurt.

Oh, it doesn't "worry" me.. lol It's a matter of personal preference, I realize that.. but it still get my goat

This is worth bringing back up. I was looking through the previous posts and some people do like certain weight and looks. What really matters to me is personality and the person takes care of themself. The perfect person, that is just something in the imagination, prone to what each person thinks perfection is. Nobody is perfect. Accept people as they are.

true, true.. I agree with that... Every man and woman has something they like in a person..

LOL...yeah, but it is funny how alot of people are looking for the same thing (which the average person doesn't have, btw). It's fine though, there are people who look outside the lines. Me for example, lol. It's shocking sometimes, even to me, of who I am attracted to. Besides, I believe most people are looking for the picture perfect person, but realize they must settle. Nice thought huh? Funny thing is most likely the other is settling for them as well, lol. Life...it is always changing, it is best to be flexible.

This made me think of my aunt and uncle. He is 7 foot tall and she is 4 foot tall. One ducks through the doorways, that would get annoying after awhile. How amny times has he been hit with a ceiling fan.

I agree - haven't we all see the pics of famous sexy, beautiful actresses or actors where their spouse is "no where near as attractive as they themselves are".

The other person must make them feel very special and very very loved.

If someone makes you feel special, loved, can make you laugh, is there for you in sorrow or pain that in of itself is beautiful and attractive.

Could this be why do many people don't stay together, they don't take the time to get to know the person before making the commitment? You can't rush a relationship. it has to grow at its own pace and depth. If you don't have that it probably won't last. I'm not claiming to know is just my opinion.

personally...I like a woman with a few extra pounds. Not attracted to gym bunnies!

Last woman I went out with was an aerobics instructor and yoga. Couldn't even begin to feel any passion for her. Now send me Delta Burke...oh, yeah!!

we are sexy with a few exta pounds, we are smart,funny,and might have a bounce when we walk and there is something to hold on too..lol we rock.. and i like a guy with meat on him

An attractive woman is comfortable in her own skin as far as I am concerned. Most real humans go up and down with weight.
Alot of people are more concerned with arm candy than anything. Ego stroking girlfriends that look like moviestars to walk around with and show off.

It's very nice that you think that way Krashenstein. I am afraid that would make me very unattractive though, lol. I am not happy with myself, but no one worry...I am not one to cry about something without making an effort to change! God help everyone if I ever reach my goal, lol...

Moonshadow I agree with you People who are so superficial to only want someone with a certain body type or certain physical attribute are pitiful. To me REAL Beauty is a combination of things Such as Attitude, Compassion, Personality, How they take care of themselves (Cleanliness) Intelligence. Do they put too much emphasis on Physical Attributes or are they materialistic?
I always ask these people if they found the person of their dreams and Married them, What would they do if six months later their spouse was in a horrible accident and were disfigured and/or handicapped? Would they be forced to divorce them?? And if so I pity both of them. To me a girl can be a size 5 but if her personality is Mean or if she has no compassion then she is less attractive than the girl who is honest and compassionate and a size 16. Just my opinion tho.

tell it like it is. Just an opinion here, so please no personal attacks!!!! But I think women with a little extra cushion for the pushin. are hot! Thin women tend to be too into themselves. Just my observation! Look at my age...been observing for a long, long time...LMAO

I feel the exact way about men. Too thin is not attractive to me. I like thick...doesn't neccessarily have to be muscle either. Arms and chest attract me the most. Besides it would drive me insane if I was thicker than him

Well, Im not skinny, and I'm not over weight. It's just luck, I guess, because I don't exercise. But, I feel the same as you do.