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i really feel for you. sorry to hear what's just happeed to you. you must feel pretty alone but at least you share a love, that should be comforting to know.

If I wasnt 51 I would go out with you.

I know this may not be what you want to hear, but you fell in love with a married man. You are the "other" woman. Did you really expect him to leave his wife/family for you?

I know that the heartbreak you are feeling is real, but I think that you need to look at the situation that you were in and realize that the entire relationship that you had with this man was wrong.

My advise to you is try dating someone that is available. That way if you fall in love....it may work out for you in the long run.

i know the pain that you feel, i feel it as well. your situation is almost just like mine. i was dating a women 13 years younger than me and i was married at the time. my marriage ended and i got divorced. the women broke up with me and i have not recovered really from it. i still don't know why she left me, basically i think it was guilt that she felt she was the reason my marriage ended; although she was not. I am trying to get on with my life get back out there, that is why i joined this site. i know, i felt she was my soul mate. the thing is you never know what the future will bring. the man you are with may no longer want to be with you which is sad. the pain comes from the fact that you try to shut off your feelings for the person, this is very hard to do and usually leads to so kind of change in your character. You have to see it as it is his loss. he is is the fool for you had all the love for him. the truth is he may not be able to love or be ready for love because of his own faults. the women i was with just was not ready to grow up and leave parting and just acting stupid with her friends. i realize i can not change her, and why would i want to be with somebody who does not want to be with me, am i not better than that. be nice to this man be his friend if you want to but if he does not want to be with you, he has the problem. four years is a long time you can still love him in your mind you do not have to hate him for what he did but know that you are special and deserver the best. learn from what happen to you and try to move on. i am in therapy now, not saying it will be easy but take it one day at a time. cry all you want, let it out, write it all down, then smile and go on. life is ups and downs but life is too short to stay down. best of luck to you.

Let go and let time heal…Ok?…This too shall pass. Hang in there.

I feel your pain too. I was in a 6 year and the day I was going to propose, was the day she told me that she wants to move on. All I can honestly say is.... Let time do the healing and dont put any man between you and god. Whatever doesnt kill you makes you stronger.

Life is full of pain sometimes but just know that you will find happiness again.

this isnt going to sound good but if you are going to go into a situation where one party is married, then these simple rules must be followed:

1. do not give your heart out.

2. refer to rule #1.


With that said, I do feel for you. You seem like a real sweet girl. Feel free to write me if you need some advice from someone who has had an affair like yours.


later.

ooops, sorry, I didnt see the date stamp on your initial post. I am way late!

ill date ya

i dont want to be mean but u shouldve never started dating him... he was MARRIED! if when he met you all those yrs ago and didnt leave hgis wife right away then you shouldve known that he was never going to leave her. Dont ever listen to a man when he says "it's just not the right time for me to tell her" of course there isnt! when the hell is a good time to leave someone? NEVER u just have to do it! if he didnt do it from the beginning then he never was! you need to think that you are worth more and deserve more and deserve to be someone's all not just some.

You are classified as a jump off. He has no emotional attachment to you at all regardless of how much you want to believe he has. He used you. Thats basically it. And your not soul mates because he would of left his wife for you. You got what comes to you deal with it. Sorry if I sound harsh but I have no sympathy for someone who has the balls to mess with someones marriage.

He loved u enough to sleep with some one else every nite

well my love true love they say cant be broken, on the other hand most people lost for love. you might love him and you think he loves you back becuse you so much love him baby if he really love you he will tell is wife that he has a girlfriend and he is in love with her if he can do that then you will know that he is your soul mate well deos is wife know about you two sweet heart what i will tell you is to let hem go pls may be you are taking lost for love they is a saying that when one goes another comes well i pray you get some one that will love you forever and may the angels be with you all your days

i know what your goin through sad to say butyou need to realize that he has made is chose to move on with his wife and thats not going to change unless you wish that they get a divorce. sooner are later you will get over it, it may not be tommorow or next week but it will happen. i hope i help some how. dont beat up urself over this. :)

You will love more than one person in your lifetime. This may sound cold but moving on is the fastest way to get over someone. You are free and should enjoy your freedom until you find your "one." Love is hard to get over when you're young. Later in life, you'll see that more than one person can make you happy. Life gets easier than.
That's just what I've found. I'm not an expert on love and can only speak for myself.
I hope you find your happiness.

You belong to youself not a man . Its very hard my ex left me and I had to start again and pick up all my pieces. Just remember my dear guys are like fish its always a better catch. Love is totally not fair my heart feels your pain . But dont settlin yourself go get some good red wine and go buy some red shoes and dance in you living room . Change your views and change the world . Good luck :cheering:

Sorry to hear about your situation.....But i am going to be honest.......He is married.....After being together for all those years,if he really wanted to have you in his life or as his wife,dont you think by now he would have gotten divorced....I been divorced,its not easy,but its not always about what people say to you,look at his actions....Your missing out on a lot of things in your life being with a married guy..I wish you the best in dealing in your hard time....