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I have had this discussion with quite a few people who all seem to hold strong views on this subject and am interested in other peoples opinions on this.

I tell my own son often...I am not your friend, I am your parent, I am the one that loves you most and your welfare is my concern so you may not always like me but later you will respect me...
He has his own means to make friends, I hope to be his mentor and muse, perhaps sometimes his enemy but only in his eyes temporarily

Hi P.T.
I think I,m a mentor and a friend to my children, when they were small yes I taught them what I could about life, right from wrong, respect, manners etc I always told them they could chat to me about anything that I would never be shocked and they did!!!Now they are all adults I have 4 of the best friends I could ask for, I,ve had to let them go to face the big bad world but they know I,m always here for them no matter what and I,ll always love them through thick and thin.

Mentors.
In Greek Mythology Mentor was the guide that helped Oddysseus on his many journeys. Respect to all the parents out there but sorry, we are way not as cool as our child's other friends

Both !
I concur completely with Cathy's post.
Children need to be treated a different way throughout the various stages of their lives. But at all times, parents need to be approachable.
If we play the Big Bad Wolf, are too disciplinarian or act merely as mentor, we will never have a fully developed relationship with our children. That free-flow, 2 way street of communication is vital if we are to know exactly what is going on in our children's lives at every stage. I think if all parents practised parenting in this way, they would be on top of things before they ever get out of hand.
My 2 girls are grown up now too and we are best of friends. They still come to me with their problems & even though I know they also consult their friends and boyfriends with issues, none of the 3 of us would ever consider leaving each other 'out of the loop'.

i know this thread was a while ago but i came across it today and i would like to give a view from the other side if i may... i do not have children but as a child once and a teenager who is now a 42 yr old woman ... i am glad my parents were my friends as well as my mentors...

When my mother died 9 yrs ago suddenly i lost not only my mother, my business partner but most of all my best friend.. She taught me as i grew to respest others have impeccable manners but most of all how to treat all other people but she also taught me the true meaning of the word friendship... it was only after my mother died that a lot sunk in and now am such good friends with my dad and i wouldnt have it any other way...

i have all different kinds of friends from all walks of life and my dad is just another to add to the list and i am proud to say that...

I am who i am because of them .. So to them ... Thank you

I never try to be my childrens friend.
They have friends and don't want me to act like their friends do.
I am not their friend, you tell things to your friend and do things with your friends that you would not tell/do with your parents/children.

When it actually comes down to it, I am their best friend, but I am not their friend.
I hope that makes sense.

I am their Mother. I don't think they want to hang out with me or vice versa.

I agree with Cathy and Chinagirl. My son is only 4 so of course right now I can only be his mentor. But as he gets older and especially moves into mid to late teens, I'm not going to be able to control his life. All I can do then is offer him advice as a parent / friend and hope he follows it.

I agree 100%... with teenagers it can be difficult because they are allergic to anything which resembles mothering... because they are not children... what is important to remember though.. is they are not adults either.. so they need (and want) boundaries.. the best balance I think is to gradually give them responsibility which is earned through trust, but never let them forget who the parent is

I suppose we are mentors while they are kids.They depend on you completly.But once they start sussing out this whole life thing, we can only be friends.We are all fairly equal in our ignorance, so once they see you dont know everything.........
Though i myself only have a nephew to go by

It seems to me that almost everyone has said pretty much the same thing - parents are parents whom, at the same time, can be 'friends' with their children. It seems to me that moderation in everything, including moderation, is the key to successful child rearing. Sadly though, when we look at society today, one can only wonder whether as parents, we have left a better society for generations to come. Have we really laid a solid foundation? Individually as parents, perhaps we have - but have we collectively? Perhaps only time will tell.