Fri May 23, 2008 5:43 PM CST : On the lighter side...
Everybody who has a dog calls him ",Rover", or ",Boy.", I call mine Sex.
Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, ",I'd like to have one, too.", Then I said, ",But this is a dog!", He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, ",But you don't understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old.", He said I must have been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said every room in the place was for sex. I said, ",You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at night!", The clerk said, ",Me too.",
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. ",But you don't understand,", I said, ",I had hoped to have Sex on TV.", He called me a show-off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight custody of the dog. I said, ",Your honor, I had Sex before I was married.", The judge said, ",Me too.", Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, ",Me too.",
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, ",What are you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning?", I said, ",I'm looking for Sex.",
My case comes up next week.