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emotional abuse would be constant putting down of someone , like not giving nice compliments , like always saying they are doing the wrong thing , that nothing they wn looks good on them.. Basically anything anti-complimentary could be classed as some form of emotional abuse.

thats my thoughts anyway

I think that emotional abuse is deliberately hurting someone emotionally. Making a comment that someone finds offensive can hardly be seen as emotional abuse. How are we to know what someone might, or might not, take offense to?

Where do you draw the line?... I mean jesus fucking christ, some people still find blasphemy offensive.

So is there anyone out there that is not guilty of being emotionally abusive? Are we becoming too soft because we are sensitive to so much that people can say? Or does it swing the other way that we are too tolerant now about foul language and blasphemy?

ok Im going out on a limb here I do actually agree with what Bourb wrote. and as a christian it has never bothered me the blasphemy . and I do totally agree with Ralf to ( what a fence sitter ).

I feel we have at times are way too tolerant, but in the same token some people can be over sensitive but that also means we have to be careful with how we come across to other people and how much what we say may hurt them

This is getting too deep... for this shallow male.

This is getting too deep... for this shallow male.

yep,,,I agree Lok

I have been on the receiving end of that... it isn't nice

I am just asking the question, i am not really sure where i should stand on this issue. I am not for people being abusive at all, but I do believe in freedom of speech which is being taken away from us, but again in some cases, rightfully so. It is such a grey area. It is hard to know what is appropriate and find a balance between being able to speak your mind and not offending people.

I dwell on things if i don't say them and what makes my sanity any less valuable than someone elses who i may offend by saying something? I don't keep grudges either, so i can say something and that is it, i am over it.

I love you.

awwwwwwwww thanks ralfy I love you too

you made me get all teary eyed then

It is a great question though ., yes we can use the old saying to treat people the way we would like to be treated.

It is also as i have found a cultural issue in some ways, all of us on here are happy. we stir each other up , etc in a fun way but some other culture i have found dont get our sense of humour or that side to us.

I personaly feel that we have all said things to someone that afterwards we wish we could take back you point about freedom of speech is a good and valid point.

My one worry or concern is the politically correcntess at schools, and in society and also the accessability of broader communication ( i.e. internet, mobiles, etc) and this has added to the problem

jesus you sound like me lol.. i had the same query as you lol

I often wonder with political correctness if it will get to a point where we can't even make a joke. If you think about most jokes they are taking the piss from just about every group of people. We need the ability to laugh at ourselves so we can learn to deal with negativity.

Well you must be the butt of a lot of jokes being Irish, you gotta have thick skin.

I totally agree with you Ralfy. As you would know as a mum its almost like they want to brainwash the kids at an early age that its a perfect world, all positive, rosy, etc and its not.

Even with some issues like bullying its almost like everyone must feel sorry for the person who caused it not the victim. To some degree I think that makes sense as it can be a problem that if worked on at an early age may go away. Teachers even seem to take the gently/softly approach, my niece & nephew would die if they had some of my teachers. But you are so right it doesnt teach them to deal with negativity, and also it doesnt teach them the difference of whats a joke and what is not nice

whatever happened to the rhyme...'Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me'? It also makes me wonder about the what impact, if any, this has on mental illness. It is a lot of hard working processing what you have to say all the time, surely it takes it's toll.

I wonder a lot, can you tell?

I thought it was sitcks & stones may break my bonres but whips and chains excite me .

I would never have known that you wonder and think a lot .
Its a good trait to have.I think it does, but I feel we need another thread sadly just for mental health/illness.I do a lot of work for the Education Department here with grounds 7 facilities, I had a placement at a High School in Adelaide's North eastern suburbs, I had to sadly go into the girls toilets on a regular basis to help get the occassional one out who had tried commiting suicide , the youngest was 13 and you wonder what leads a young girl to want to contemplate that.

We just have to lead by example ( scary thought ). No I just think if we can set our children, friends etc an example then maybe we will all live in a better more harmonious place

Oh god, that is a real worry Steven. I remember my mum saying once, 'I can't believe the confidence young girls have today'. I think it is the opposite, i think it is just bravado for a bunch of scared impressionable beings. My boys come home from school telling me about all the fights at school, and they are mainly girls. They say that the boys just think it is ridiculous. It is very sad that they feel they have to act like that when inside they must feel so vulnerable.

Personally I think that there is a line in the sand when it comes to having a good insulting argument and emotional abuse.

I believe its abuse when the insult/s are constant, an everyday occurrence. When one constantly tells a child/partner they are fat, useless, whatever that becomes abuse.

It takes a long time, to come back from that, to rebuild ones confidence. Thats when you know that you've been abused.