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Can a person succeed in changing their partner to conform with their ideals of how he should treat her.

My personal opinion is that you cannot change anyone but you could make suggestions for change and hope that if he/she cares enough then they will try to do things differently to keep you happy.

Is change better..........or would it be better to find someone already house trained?

Forgive me for saying so but i am of the firm belief that if you or your partner have to change to keep the other one happy then you probably shouldn't be together.

We should accept people for who they are and not what we want them to be. The way i see it is that if we have to change someone to suit us then they wouldn't be the person we first developed feelings for.

If your partner isn't treating you right, then why change them to suit you, makes more sense to move on and find the person who is going to treat you the right way. If you have to put up with someone treating you the wrong way then they don't respect you and why be there in the first place.

But hey i am only one persons opinion

Well said...

well thing is that if it is clothing or hair style and or light alteration to attitude I agree but it is delecate ground, one Lady I dated I was so into her that it really did not mater what she had for cloths but did walk lightly when it came to sugestions, Jimi is right and it is a road ya have to walk on and try to smooth it out and be smooth

the other thing is I needed changes in that relationship, in that time, in those areas, in that place, in more ways than one in and about all that, from a wild Drilling Rigger in those days, in that era, in that decade kinda glad she did some work on me, "When to draw the Line" is another thing,

Some good answers by all here, if that is the answer ya want, if that is what ya want to hear, if ya can see the light at the end o fthe tunnel if ya will ever get out of the tunnel, if ya can see, if ya even want to see....

A drilling rigger? Don't you mean a riglet?

Good suggestions and comments.
personally I learnt to take it as it comes, if the subject is too far out walk quietly away, If near to be let the corners rubb about a bit and see if it is comfy.
At the end of the day it is far better to be happy alone than to be miserable trying to meet some idiots expectations.
thats my 2 cents anyway.

" FORGET IT"

few names ya can think of eh?

Yes and no Raina. It comes down to size of problem, Each others attitude to each other and your long term relationship, And how you go about it.

As Others implied Some things are just to big to change Lump or like it. Others are just a mind set. Alter the Mind set and you alter how they behave.

A good councillor will see no Barriers but will learn and adapt. A great communicator will see no issues and forget when to accept defeat.
A good Partner will try and then try to adapt.
A Good relationship will Flex and adapt.

If it means that much walk away. If it doesn't but can be annoying at times attempt change or adapt.

If anyone has done Dog Obedience. They also learn how to train others. Do Good get reward. Do Bad be reprimanded and withhold reward. What works on Dogs for training also works on Humans. And Boredom is the biggest killer of Training.

So on that thought. When training a Male always use sex as the reward. To avoid Boredom, Ensure it is always a reward on a sexual theme.

my belief is that if we want our partner to change something for us then all we can do is ask and as you say raina, if they care enough and want to make the change all well and good.

if not, then we have to ask ourselves 'do i love this person enough to live with them the way they are right now?'

i hear a lot of women say that their partners have so much potential . . "if only they would get their act together".

its futile to fall in love with 'potential'. you have to accept someone with all their faults . . if you cant then its time to let go and move on . . no matter how much you care about them.

Exactly

Except I omitted to mention change in how one behaves towards ones partner ie , rude and without consideration.

I unfortunately had a couple visit for a week over Xmas holidays. The male was inconsiderate towards his partner, she was demanding that he change or end the relationship.

Makes sense

Self analysis

My opinion also

If it's faultly throw it out

Not good enough at all sorry.............you deserve better than that!!!!!!!

No one should go into a relationship with the view to changing anyone, however after a period of time you do naturally change as you take on each others different view points.. or the ones that make sense as well as we learn to compromise so naturally that means changing our way we want to do things or think... but intentional manipulation for the betterment of one party is not healthy at all but yes you see it frequently.

Dont think you can change anyone ...dont think you should ...Not into fixeruppers if you dont like what you see moooove on!