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100% agree with you. Took me probably 5 years to totally get over my ex, during that time i was with a couple of guys but needless to say it didn't work coz i was still so hurt over my ex. Since then i have got my life back, went back to school and did a couple of courses i always wanted to do, changed direction in my job and spend beautiful times with my baby grand daughter, theres no man in my life but thats ok, i am in no hurry. Life is fairly good now and i agree, you are better off spending time getting to know yourself again, getting to be yourself again. It worked for me.

I would agree it only takes time. Remeber its only your ex who is gone, all your family and friends are still there. And besides look around you and on this web site, You are not alone, and we are all survivors.

Talking like this helps, Hell even I am happy now days, 3 years on : have one on me, it cant hurt

And the time it takes does not have to be spent being miserable, you have friends and family who still love you so concentrate on the good not the "also ran" s

i think the friends part, may just prolong it. As the part of having them around with all the little reminds and the potential possibility of hope would send me nutty.

i think healing is a personal thing and there is always something that we can do for ourselves to speed up the process, if we want to. Some chose not to and wally in self pitty.

death is the only thing that is final with a no return ticket.............. So get out there and enjoy life your way and who knows what will happen.

time may heal all things but who the fark wants to waste it, when life is to short

Change your perspective..

instead of thinking life sucks cos your now alone and lonely (negative thoughts attract more negativity into your life)..

think how good it is to be single and free to do what you want when you want (positive thoughts attract positive experiences and events)

Live for the future grow and learn from the past. You will know when the time is right to take the next step. It is not fair on the new partner if your stuck in the past thinking of the ex. For some it takes longer than 5 months. Broken hearts are mended by coming to terms with a loss, not dwelling on them.

JMO

The next best thing is to remove the person who broke your heart from your life. Don't allow them to be a part of it in any way. Not a friend, not even someone you talk to once a month. Remove them completely as if they never existed. Once you've healed and can think about being with someone else, then you let someone new come to you.

that's deep, sounds like someone needs a hug, ..... where's blondeozichick


retail therapy, purchase horsepower, that way even if you cant ride it, you've got something you can run the mongrel that broke your heart over with

I love your idea of therapy, why didnt I think of that, Horspower.

Best cure for an old love is a new love

Time is what is needed. You need to learn to be alone is not a bad thing but being lonley is.

Hi Josh, sounds like you need DR Jimi's advice and i hear Kiz is filling in for him while he is away, but here is my 2cents worth, i agree you have to get out there and meet new people, she may have been your dream girl, but we always get 2nd chances meeting a new person, so give yourself time to heal, dont compare others to her if you can, and try not to have anymore contact with her WHATSOEVER! otherwise the memories, pain and heartache will continue,Its early days so give yourself time it will all be ok

Yep , enjoy being single , god it doesnt happen that often ...

open the seal on the wild oats you stored away & start sowing ,,,
Its planting season !

Harvest time will come alone soon enough....

This is fantastic advice and from a male im totally impressed

Twodawgz: The next best thing is to remove the person who broke your heart from your life. Don't allow them to be a part of it in any way. Not a friend, not even someone you talk to once a month. Remove them completely as if they never existed. Once you've healed and can think about being with someone else, then you let someone new come to you.

There's been some great advice here, but I reckon Dawgz has the pick.
When you are so emotionally attached to someone who doesn't feel that way in return, it is kinder on yourself to put some distance between the two of you. At least enough to not be crossing paths. Don't ring....don't visit...no 'why did we do it' meetings to talk things over....it all just makes it so much worse.

I reckon theres nothing like good old fashioned revenge ....

I agree... Revenge is sweet

and a dish best served cold...

kizzy27: I reckon theres nothing like good old fashioned revenge ....

Don't get MAD
Just get EVEN

Mmm.....

Ill tell ya little secret
Make you wanna jump and shout
When you talk to me in circles
Take your foot out of your mouth
Its hard enoguh to make it
When youre livin on the street
And you want to tell somebody
But you got to be discreet
Then you catch your girlfriend
With her skirt hiked up to here
Honey, dont get mad, get even

(corus)
Dont get mad get even
Dont get mad get even, yeah
Dont get mad get even

Say the times they be a-changing
Though the blind lead the blind
And you know your head is empty
Though theres something on your mind
Shackin up with lucy and when the morning comes
Youre with sally in the ally
And the junkies and the bums
You wonder why your girlfriend
Has her skirt hiked up to here
Honey, dont get mad, get even

(chorus)
(spoken: ....till I can see the white o
Your eyes, baby...just wait till i...
Im gonna fuck up, mm hmm, Im gonna kick ass
You just wai to see what Ive got in store...)

Roll the dice get lucky
cause they roll ya for a dime
You got nothing else to lose
If ya only loose your mind
When pleasure that is shallow
Causes trouble to be deep
Youve been dusted with the devil
While he sweeps you off your feet
Huh,

Tell you little secret
Make you want to jump and shout
When you talk to me in circles
Take your foot out of your mouth
Its hard enough to make it
When youre livin on the street
And you hate to be a wise guy
When your feet are inconcrete
Sleeping with the dogs
And you wake up with the fleas
Honey, dont get mad, get even

Twodawgz: Mmm.....

Ill tell ya little secret
Make you wanna jump and shout
When you talk to me in circles
Take your foot out of your mouth
Its hard enoguh to make it
When youre livin on the street
And you want to tell somebody
But you got to be discreet
Then you catch your girlfriend
With her skirt hiked up to here
Honey, dont get mad, get even

(corus)
Dont get mad get even
Dont get mad get even, yeah
Dont get mad get even

Say the times they be a-changing
Though the blind lead the blind
And you know your head is empty
Though theres something on your mind
Shackin up with lucy and when the morning comes
Youre with sally in the ally
And the junkies and the bums
You wonder why your girlfriend
Has her skirt hiked up to here
Honey, dont get mad, get even

(chorus)
(spoken: ....till I can see the white o
Your eyes, baby...just wait till i...
Im gonna fuck up, mm hmm, Im gonna kick ass
You just wai to see what Ive got in store...)

Roll the dice get lucky
cause they roll ya for a dime
You got nothing else to lose
If ya only loose your mind
When pleasure that is shallow
Causes trouble to be deep
Youve been dusted with the devil
While he sweeps you off your feet
Huh,

Tell you little secret
Make you want to jump and shout
When you talk to me in circles
Take your foot out of your mouth
Its hard enough to make it
When youre livin on the street
And you hate to be a wise guy
When your feet are inconcrete
Sleeping with the dogs
And you wake up with the fleas
Honey, dont get mad, get even

Never heard it before...but singing it already

Hi, i agree with what most of the others have said in that it takes time. I think that until you are happy to be alone and not need or have to have someone else in your life then the next relationship you enter will be that so much better.

Take all you have learned from the break up as in, you will now know some more things that you do and do not want out in a relationship and use them to your advantage. Don't go rushing into anything with anyone. Lets face it these days 4-5months is only a small amount of time to get over anything.

In the mean time, spend time with you family and friends and get to know who you are all over again and enjoy it while you can :)

just my thoughts :)