How long til the friendship ends?

Australia/New Zealand Forums » Dating Experiences » How long til the friendship ends?
THREAD AUTHOR



Lou29 Floating in the Riverina, New South Wales Australia
Tue Sep 16, 2008 10:51 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
Say you were dating/seeing/commited to someone for a few weeks/months/years and it ends and you say the whole 'but we can still be friends" thing, How long does it really last for?


A friend has just had this happen and it got me thinking. On my past 'things' I guess I can't really pin point a time frame, however I remain good friends with 2 of them. Others I would love to punch. laugh


Then I thought about other friends and I reckon 80% of the bust ups remained as friends for about 2 months which includes having a random coffee here and there or a quick drink at a pub and it just ends. No more to say on it, the friendship has gone. I find this quite sad. These are relationships that have ended nicely and no real hard feelings if you know what I mean. No nasty cheating or bad screaming matches etc.


Do you still have regular contact with ex's or are you of the 'they are all ex's for a reason, no contact' kind?

Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
psuedonym adelaide, South Australia Australia
Tue Sep 16, 2008 11:35 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
i still speak to my son's mother, and do so as amicably as possible for his sake mainly. we dont catch up for ol' times sake though, just phone calls mainly.
as for other ex's once it's done , it's done. this isnt because of any real reason, it's just the way things have panned out for me
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top



Redruby Sydney, New South Wales Australia
Tue Sep 16, 2008 11:43 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
I get along well with my ex as we share a child together and I have to see him every weekend. ( bugger huh? lol) We try to be responsible parents and let our child know that she is loved and important to us both. Even though he drives me nuts I would never let my girl see that.

But in past relationships I found that I was able to remain friends until their new girlfriend decided she didn't want me talking to them anymore. It is sad but I guess some people are only in our lives for a short time but hopefully they enrich our lives in some way.

You can tell i'm single, I have time to think about this sort of stuff LOL! purple heart
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
Karma3 Somewhere India
Wed Sep 17, 2008 2:46 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
With me its 'over and out'. I cannot climb down the relationship ladder to the 'buddy' rung.
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
blondeaozichick Melbourne, Victoria Australia
Wed Sep 17, 2008 2:58 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
well I have only had 3 long term relationships and I try to stay friends with my ex's (even f buddies).. but depends on how it ended I suppose and how strong my feelings were for them when we were together.

My kids dad and are sort of friends now.. but it sure took a long time to get to that point.. he was very bitter over the breakup for quite a few years afterwards... interfered in my life and made it very difficult if there was a sniff that I may be interested in someone else.. but eventually he found someone and now he leaves me alone and is actually quite pleasant (most of the time haha) and I'm still friends with the last guy I was with grin
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
kismat national park, Waikato New Zealand
Wed Sep 17, 2008 4:42 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
still friends with them, but I'm really elusive which helps, still there when I'm demanded rolling on the floor laughing
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top



relaxin somewhere, Queensland Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 12:25 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
Lou29: Say you were dating/seeing/commited to someone for a few weeks/months/years and it ends and you say the whole 'but we can still be friends" thing, How long does it really last for?A friend has just had this happen and it got me thinking. On my past 'things' I guess I can't really pin point a time frame, however I remain good friends with 2 of them. Others I would love to punch. Then I thought about other friends and I reckon 80% of the bust ups remained as friends for about 2 months which includes having a random coffee here and there or a quick drink at a pub and it just ends. No more to say on it, the friendship has gone. I find this quite sad. These are relationships that have ended nicely and no real hard feelings if you know what I mean. No nasty cheating or bad screaming matches etc. Do you still have regular contact with ex's or are you of the 'they are all ex's for a reason, no contact' kind?


i think as soon as sex enters the relationship there isnt really a buddy thing that happens as there is some sort of sexual attraction there.

friends by my defination has no sex in it at all.

but just a cuppa etc can be there for a life time......
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top



Lou29 Floating in the Riverina, New South Wales Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 12:45 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
kismat: still friends with them, but I'm really elusive which helps, still there when I'm demanded



Where have u been?? I have missed you. kiss










Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top



Lou29 Floating in the Riverina, New South Wales Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 12:46 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
All very true Relaxin.. Very true.


I will be back in here later to reply properly.
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
kizzy27 Nowra, New South Wales Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 1:03 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
I dont believe in burning bridges ,... but some I have to confess needed dynamite, C4 plastic explosives, a few well placed grenades,even a nuke ....


I think where once their were intense feelings its difficult when the other party finds someone else, The only way it really works is if you both are really on the same page & both know without a doubt that its ova & its better this way.
That is rare...


Now wheres that dynamite....confused
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
Twodawgz melbourne, Victoria Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 1:40 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
Depends on the nature of your relationship and your break up. Some people just can't be friends after a breakup . But others it seems natural. Sooo nope i don't have contact with any of the ex's i usally drop kickem to the kerb sounds harsh but most deserve it. laugh
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
redozichick Brisbane, Queensland Australia
Thu Sep 18, 2008 3:58 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
I've been friends with my ex since I was 19 (I'm now 38). He left me for his ex girlfriend and married her and had kids. At first it was really hard being friends with him, I got on really well with his wife who had a lot in common with me. After a few years the three of us became really good friends and my kids and their kids are friends and around similar ages so it all worked outwink
I have other ex's that I am friends with as well and don't have any thoughts of being with them in a romanic way at all.
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
sodamncute stratford, Taranaki New Zealand
Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:49 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
depends if they really want to be friends with eachother then it will last but if one of them does and the other one doesnt then it will crash and burn!
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
ploughingstar thallon, Queensland Australia
Sat Sep 20, 2008 4:26 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
sheesh too darn hard !!!! to much sexual and past tension only way it works is if there is a needed bond ie kids or something! peace
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
justlookn coffs harbour, New South Wales Australia
Thu Nov 20, 2008 5:25 AM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
kizzy27: I dont believe in burning bridges ,... but some I have to confess needed dynamite, C4 plastic explosives, a few well placed grenades,even a nuke ....I think where once their were intense feelings its difficult when the other party finds someone else, The only way it really works is if you both are really on the same page & both know without a doubt that its ova & its better this way.
That is rare...Now wheres that dynamite....
Danforth mines n punjii spikes are also effective for that purposedevil
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
sxc666 Central Coast, New South Wales Australia
Thu Nov 20, 2008 1:39 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
It's over and out with me devil
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top
poodle2000 Melbourne, Victoria Australia
Thu Nov 20, 2008 2:02 PM CST : How long til the friendship ends?
I'm still friends with my ex-husband - we split up 3 1/2 years ago
Quote Reply report this post
^ Back to top


Top of the page ^


Report this thread if it breaks rules, is offensive, or contains fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. If this thread is offensive, please click here to report it »



If site dates and times do not show correctly, you can fix this by editing your timezone
Click here to edit your timezone »