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Hey Abes, email in your BOX

phaedellis: Hey Abes, email in your BOX

Thought I was feeling a little uncomfortable

It's ok now though....it's not there anymore

I also believe marriage is a commitment for life and when I took my vows I meant them yet I'm still a divorcee.
I'm a nurse, some people can do it, some can't.
My sister is a cop, some people can do it, I couldn't.
Jason's married to a person who developed a severe uncontrolled mental illness, some can do it. he can't.
I think Shelly was, as she said, stating her opinion which was asked for after all.
I have seen people walk away from a lot less, my ex for starters, I have also seen spouses who have stuck it out to the bitter, sometimes very bitter, end.
When I read Shelly's post I didn't find it particularly judgemental, though I see how it could be read that way.
It doesn't hurt to remember that when we talk to others face to face the spoken word is only about 30% of communication. Of the spoken word only about 40% of that is the words themselves the rest is in the the inflection and tones.
The difference between praise and insult is in the way the words are said because the same words can mean very different things. (He added sarcasticly) Which is why authors use literary tools such as previous to ensure the reader understands the inflection not just the words.
Ahh, look now you've got me monologuing.
I'll never make a good evil scientist if I keep that up!

You may be right pocketts and if so I apologise to shelley and all who were offended by my outburst,I just get tired sometimes from ppl who stray off the point.Which was about my wifes mental instability not my marriage as much. I appreciate your views on this as you deal with ppl with these illnesses so you are experienced about it. I just wanted some advice not judgement on my marriage or(I can't say this enough) ppls pity.I spend enough time myself in self pity mode... I do appreciate ppls empathy though as I know I am not the only person going this.

I don't think anyone can make a call on this unless they've been there.

Some will quote 'for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, etc'.

Some will quote 'it's your life, do what you want to do, not what you're expected to do'.

Only you truly know your situation, and however you call it, it will be right by some, and wrong by others.

But your call it is, no-one elses.

For me, your daughter comes before either of you - 100%.

I hope it resolves as best it can, but I think you're 'damned if you do, damned if you don't'.

My biggest mistake was getting involved with her in the first place and trying to be a gentleman.

destiny Jason from the union your daughter was gifted to you... I have an unreasonable ex when things hurt I think this ova & Ova it helps because its the only truth that matters
Kizzy

Hello Jason. Wise words again from Kizzy and Ralf. I've come late into this conversation but feel I still have something to add. I am a Midwife and RN so do have some professional background to back me up.
Ralf's advice regarding counselling is wise in that you have been through is a major a traumatic event. One that seems to be somewhat ongoing, even though divorce is iminent. I commend you on your bravery to come forward with this in the forum, but feel that professional objective advice would be of more benefit. Your wife and mother of your child cannot be the same person you married after the traumatic events that she, herself, has experienced, nor can you ever see her in the same light. It will probably be quite a long time before she sees 'daylight', if ever. Pregnancy is well known to trigger hidden problems like these, unfortunately. It would be good if you are able to keep this in perspective, not only for your daughter but for yourself.
Kizzy's mention of destiny is pertinent too. Why this woman came into your life? What lessons you can learn from this experience? How you can this help you to grow and be a better father for your daughter?
As Pockets said this comorbidity is doubly difficult to deal with. It is so complicated, especially when emotions and little ones are concerned. 40 ECTs in 3yrs is a helluva lot! I have seen it work miracles with depression, though.
I so feel for you and wish you and your daughter, and her mother Light and Blessings

Hey Jas,

recently for 1 year i was dating a guy he had bi polar (even thou he didnt admit) yeah freaky shit its ova now but i won't go there anymore and won't date any person with a mental illness.
he exhausted & used me for what i had he's left my life (good thing) so i would suggest move on...
Kids ur decision and best interest as in life & safety wise. Get counselling for you and talk it out.

all the best

Niea

I appreciate everyones support here and I thank you all My daughter I feel is the only good thing to come from this marriage and I thank god every day for such a wonderful child.I will never evr regret having my daughter in my life as she is the best thing to ever happen to me. Jason

well said WD xx