sasseez: good to here robert...stay cool and be healthy .....think good happy thoughts you will get there
Thanks very much.......... I already feel so much at peace compared to the last five and a half years since I heard the dreadful news that my mother has just been smitten by a massive stroke and wasn't expected to survive the next 24/48 hours.
The past years worrying and caring for my parents - seeing my father dying in front of my eyes a little every day etc are now a thing of the past - time now for me to look after ME and heal from all the hurt and recent trauma.
I'm so glad I didn't cancel my flight - I almost did as I thought I wasn't well enough to travel.
I'll not fly back to Malta until Monday, 29th - by which time things should be even better and there should be a plan to survive the next six months AND see some positive results.
Regarding losing the love of my life - at least I have thousands of very happy memories that can't be taken away and all I can hope and pray is that she can have a wonderful future and maybe find love with a good man who doesn't have dangerous unresolved emotional issues............ I only wish my dear mother had gone into a nursing home a couple of months ago and then maybe I'd have not cracked up under the strain and conflict between my duty as a son and my desire for personal happiness.
Oh well, it took a crisis to finally get my mother to allow me to be 'free'............ maybe I'll one day enjoy this 'freedom' instead of punishing myself with guilt.
Thanks for the kindness you showed me. I appreciate it.