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Most of my driver friends sometimes shouts at the other crazy driver who tries to overtake, with their windows shut and there i am getting deaf every time...

Good one Rodders, I like that question it makes me laugh! I have done that too, thrown the poor phone down, jumped on it, stamped on it and flung it at the wall! Why does my dad call and when I answer, he says 'It's me, your father' when I can see it is him!

You must have some corkers being a driving instructor!

Oh dear, my friend who lives near Gatwick airport, everytime she went out and she was in her car, when she first moved there, she used to duck while driving when a plane was coming in!

actually, what I always tell my students as well when they ask me that question is, I don't really have that many troubles with the students but a lot of trouble with the drivers around me.
A "Driving School" sign means: "drive as close as possible and overtake them when it is not possible to do it".

Oh, that is a good one. My mom has interactive exchanges with the phone, doorbell, television. It is very comical. She gets downright upright with these things.

Question, very personal and unanswerable...why does my mother (who lives with me), pound on the bathroom door every morning for 2 or 3 minutes, until I turn off the shower in order to answer her, say G___, are you in there? When I say yes, she says okay, then I can finish my shower. It happens every morning and every morning I resist the urge to scream out 'Who the f___ else would it be in here ma!?!!' But I don't.

try :
"no the aliens have abducted me I'm just a stand-in until they bring Gina back"

Its even worse with mobile phones these days...

I get called by friends and they ask me:"Where are you?"

Imma it's so frustrating. My mum used to knock on my bedroom door at 7.30a.m. sharp to check whether i'm awake or not...then silence...then again knock knock knock on the door to get me my coffee 10 mins later.

joke; "Since i bought mobile to my wife she is always home"

Ooops I forget to tell you.They call my home phone

I'm with stupid

Bother is doing that.Why granny always answers my questions when i talk on phone with my friend.I just start talking and she thinks i talk to her and i have to listen both of them in a same time.

Howlers? The best statement is when a person says, ' I called you, but you did not answer' Right, I did not! Or when a person calls you and says, 'I left you five messages, why have you not called me back?' Because I am listening to your messages!

I bet you have some giggles though, nothing like talking about other people's driving.

Okay another odd one wich happens to me a lot when I am chattin.

girl:hello
rodo:hello
girl:are you awake?
rodo:NO Im sleeping...

Who the heck is that? Now my mom has real reason to be worried....

Another one you could use is: "I'll ask her" then you say out loud "are you here" answer "yes" then answer your mother with "yup she's here"

I'm doin' it tomorrow morn'. And when she recovers from her heart attack...because she ALWAYS does.....I am gonna tell her 'The Wooffman made me do it'....

I guarantee that you will be sleeping with one eye open for the next of your natural life....

First of all, why would you need to look INSIDE the sandwich, do they not make normal sandwiches in Austria, with no extra slice of bread covering all that cheese or sausage?

But suppose it was one of those covered ones... I don't think I'd un-glue it to look inside it, but if it's someone who doesn't know me, I'd definitely ask if there was no meat or chicken in it. Otherwise, I have no problems and I wouldn't double-check after asking and getting a confirmation, for sure. (I appreciate other people preparing food as I'm a bad cook myself)

Ok another odd question my friend asks on a regular basis.

vriend:"Alles goed?" translated All's well?

I say yes I'm good but the world is bad.