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About me and who I'm looking for

About me:

I like anything that gets my head outta my head. I like kinda crazy people unless they're one of the kinds of crazy I can't relate to. (there's 11 kinds and I relate well to 7 of them) I'm a writer/ producer of TV shows and movies. I lead a quiet, creative, artists life. I have 3 silly rescued dogs, a few bucks, and for a guy, I'm not a bad guy. If I was a woman I'd go out with me. I have a weakness and love for creative people. As to being single, well, let me first say, A! OH SWEET GOD IN HEAVEN MAKE IT STOP! Ok. got that out of my system. Thing is, I love to be alone but I hate being lonely. HUGE DIFFERENCE. Single folk are a strange bunch. Beautiful, bitter, desperate, perfect, not good enough, stubborn, too nice, too mean, too picky, not picky enough, too forgiving, unforgiving, brave, scared, suckers, hopeful, hopeless, tired and tireless. I wear my heart on my sleeve and hurting my feelings takes no genius. If I write to you and you don't write me back ... WHY NOT?! IT'S JUST AN EMAIL! I'm the guy you won't think you'd ever like that turns out you do. there's many better looking guys. there's many, smarter, more fashionable, younger guys. but you won't find a guy that cares more deeply me. you won't find someone on here that does the right thing without question or reward faster than moi. I don't know if these qualities are even considered desirable anymore. I hope they are. we live in a cruel world that I often don't understand and often doesn't understand me. but i never give up hope. never. now, let's lighten the mood a little, ok? step down there to what I want to do on a date. i think you'll like it. we'll talk later, ok? it's just below me there....see it? ok, bye now.
PS - I smoke sometimes when i'm nervous but as you know, if you check that box, no one in california will speak to you. when i'm with someone that doesn't smoke, I don't either. it's a nervous thing. i'm not Bogart.

I'm looking for:

Violent, ex cons. Women that talk super loud to people from other countries thinking they will understand them better that way. Really moody with no warning is good. nuthin prettier than a chick with a full back tattoo of a snake or any reptile that she tells you took like, 3 years to have finished. I like women who talk on the phone in the car on the first date. Women who whine a lot are cool. Shallow is good too. Also, a girl that is never more than half listening to anything I say is a must. please have entitlement issues, Daddy issues, hate your body, never take advice, and roll your eyes at me in front of my friends often. lots of drama and drug problems are always a treat. and baggage. please have the entire American tourister set. if you're taking all this seriously you're going to hate me, which of course, is one tiny step away from loving me so write me anyway. emails don't bite, grope or give you that disappointed, "this is gonna be an early night" look. The End.