Top 10 reasons I cannot get a date in person and am using an onl

Am I crazy or does online "dating" seem to be a last ditch effort or resort? I have my personal reasons and let me begin!

I live in the middle of the woods

the chicks at wal mart have two teeth in their mouth and five in their pocket.

I dig japanese animation and watch in my voltrol underoose

you cannot smell gas online

gossip mongers can be easily shut up bye a simple disconnection of my trusty verizon air card.

I can read typed words easier than breacking down your accent...I live in Al. mind you.

my ride is broke down but I can tell you about the jaguar I told you I have but don't.

You can't see me

I like to stimulate my bizarre imagination

and of course....I have nothing better to do.

Comments (28)

raine4766Jan 19, 2012FWB Florida, Mahboula, Al Asimah Kuwait

You crack me up! That was hilarious!

zoran22Jan 17, 2012knoxville, Tennessee USA

my tween brother...

akalinskNov 9, 2011Culbertson, Nebraska USA

Some_DudeNov 4, 2011Wagga Wagga, New South Wales Australia

lol

autoladyOct 27, 2011Dubai, United Arab Emirates

lol

AlwaysMineOct 24, 2011Spokane, Washington USA

hahahahahabwaahhaaaaha

Kitty93Oct 24, 2011Arendal, Aust-Agder Norway

honest and funny .... it can not be better!

UriahXGOct 19, 2011Lindstrom, Minnesota USA

It's ingenious...and he's right, if it was me, i'd say

10. I barely have any common sense
9. i'm immature
8. I have acne
7. i'm getting slightly chubbier daily
6. I'm broke
5. I'd be so embarrased from my friends
4. Only 1 girl liked me in high school
3. most women I know that are older than me don't want to date me
2. most women my age...are my friends
1. I'm not hot (but neither am I hideously ugly, I'm average)

#1 reason I can't find a date on here, there's no one from Cambridge Minnesota that's 18-20(22 at max) on here

Cambridge,MN,USA,Earth,Universe,3rd Dimension

Sincerely,
One of the most qualified suitors
Uriah X.G.

Rock On

MsKatieFeb 23, 2011Omaha, Nebraska USA

that was funny

Jazz_19Nov 29, 2010tucson, Arizona USA

bahahahaHAHAHAHAHAH that's so f*cking hilarious i love your honesty its hard to fiend sum one like you that spics the truth and don't give a dam what odor people say about you. as for making may day i give u a big kiss MMMMUUUUAAAAHHHH >.<

spiritbabe1210Nov 27, 2010ELGIN, Highland, Scotland UK

Hey can i be little red riding hood, who comes skipping through the woods, you can be the big bad wolf, and jump me.................

Love your sense of humour honey

tarapappAug 17, 2010London, Ontario Canada

Nothing you said in your post is on the advertisement pamphlets of any vacation resort I've ever looked at. Whether they be the first resort, or as you claim, the last resort.

RussianGirl1059Aug 1, 2010Irvine, California USA

maryyramJul 27, 2010Gorgan, Iran

Haha....funnyyy!!!!:D

aaronisoneMay 5, 2010salem, Oregon USA

same here i am with you dude

Catriona_xxxMay 5, 2010Dublin, Ireland

Very funny!!!

lardzeppelinApr 30, 2010unknown, Clare Ireland

top trump, all us country dwellers are now sussed... great laugh...thanks...LZ.

VenomousLipsApr 16, 2010North Shore City, Auckland New Zealand

You live in the middle of the woods .... omf! You Little Red Riding Hood - explains a lot lol

Winkywoo28Mar 31, 2010Belfast, Antrim Ireland

Ha! Comedy gold, my friend!

nothingurlMar 22, 2010Mayo, Ireland

love it!

ZOMBIEGIRL24Mar 22, 2010SALEM, Oregon USA

AWESOME!!!!

theshlobsMar 11, 2010Sotogrande, Andalusia Spain

Don't be pre-judging them chicks at Walmart! Any teeth is good teeth!

aliveandwelllJan 20, 2010Mesa, Arizona USA

Now that was funny!

Has anyone ever told you that you look like Eminem? LOL... You have a great sense of humor.

Have you tried to see if there is anyone else out there in the woods thinking the same thing that you are? Keep your great sense of humor and enjoy life.

Thanks for sharing your list.

GodslaveJan 19, 2010Nowhere, North Carolina USA

As if we women dont KNOW abt your 'imagination!"

BlainXJan 14, 2010mansfield, Ohio USA

9. I like to stimulate my bizarre imagination,,

Yea, Never admit that to a women until at least a year of dating her...

pantia88Nov 12, 2009habana, Greater La Havana Cuba

jajajajaja..!!

mjamesNov 8, 2009napa, California USA

LOL; funny, nice

EmanuelllaNov 5, 2009eastern europe, Moldova

that WAS funny

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Created: Nov 2009

Last Viewed: Apr 18

Last Commented: Jan 2012

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