If you can't seem to get past the first or second date with anyone, it's time to look at which of your actions or behaviors might be causing that. Here are five things that guarantee you'll be unpopular in the dating world.
Discussing marriage during the first date or pushing the topic early in the relationship is a quick way to turn dates off. You do want to know that the person you're dating wants the same thing as you, but you don't need to make it a topic of discussion over dinner. If you do focus on marriage and children during a first date, you might come off as desperate or eager to rush things. If you have a child, this is a good thing to mention, but avoid sharing pictures and details of their latest doctor's appointment. You don't want to push your children, family, or pets on a date early on, but it's important to let someone know what they are walking into so they can decide if it's for them or not.
If you're only interested in talking about yourself, you'll quickly become unpopular with any date. The point of dates is to get to know each other. If you're spending all your time talking about your achievements, problems, and what you picked up at the grocery store, your date will probably begin to feel as if they don't matter. As interesting as you might be, no one will stick around to you listen to you talk about yourself forever. It's important to allow your date to tell their own stories without you jumping in and making it about you. Remember to ask questions and be genuinely interested in them.
Having a glass of wine during a date isn't a bad thing, but if you can't stop there and find yourself getting tipsy or wasted, this is going to make a bad impression. If you drink so much that you can no longer hold a conversation, remember your date's name, or have trouble walking, this is a red flag and big indicator of why you aren't getting more dates with the same person. If you can't stop at one drink, stick with water and coffee instead.
If you're online dating, it's important that you don't lie. This should go without saying, but people still do it. If you lie, you're going to get caught. You can't post pictures of yourself from two years ago when you colored your hair purple (even if it looked amazing), if your hair isn't the same now. You might have a favorite picture of yourself that you want to use, but if it doesn't reflect the way you look now, you're being dishonest. Have current photos taken that you're proud to show off. Don't embellish other facts about yourself such as your job, hobbies, or education. You'll rarely get past a first date if you lie on your dating profile.
Dating isn't easy, so you want to make sure you aren't doing anything to lower your chances of success. If you notice yourself doing any of the above, you can change your habits and increase your chances of success.
Would YOU like to publish an article on Connecting Singles? Are you an expert at something, have an interesting story, or a good lesson to teach... why not share with other members. If you have experience or expertise in a topic that will be of interest to CS members, you may submit an article to be published on the site.
Post your own Article »