Make Fear Your Friend, Not Your Enemy
Has fear ever prevented you from doing something, going somewhere, or trusting someone? If so, you are not alone. Fear is an emotion experienced by everyone. It is important, however, not to allow fear to stop you from enjoying life or doing the things you want or need to do.
Fear is a universal emotion. Everyone feels afraid sometimes. It is nothing to be ashamed of, although in our society, it is unusual to admit that you are afraid. However, even though fear is a normal and natural emotion, it can appear to take control of you. If you allow it to, fear can become your enemy, holding you back and preventing you from doing things that you would like to do.
In her book, "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway," Dr Susan Jeffers states that you should embrace your fears, accepting that they exist and moving forward anyway, even though you are afraid. Once you have confronted a fear in this way a few times, it will begin to diminish and it will no longer have the hold over you that it once had.
Most people experience fear of the unknown. It is normal to be afraid of new situations and experiences that you have not encountered before but it is important that you do not allow this feeling to hold you back from having those experiences.
Once you have experienced something that you were afraid of, you will realize that it was not as frightening as you first imagined it to be. Confronting a difficult situation while you are afraid takes courage, but it is ultimately worthwhile as you will build more confidence and courage with every challenge that you face.
If your life changes suddenly through betrayal, divorce, death of a loved one, loss of a job, or another unexpected event, it is natural to be afraid of the future. However, it is also important to look at your options and move forward. In doing so, you will ultimately create a better life for yourself. By confronting situations in which you feel afraid, you will develop strength of character and become a more resilient person after a period of change.
If you feel as if fear is holding you back, make a list of the things you would like to do if you were not afraid to do them. Then, choose the one thing that you are least afraid of and write down five small steps that you can take that will move you towards doing this. For example, if you are a nervous driver who would like to become a confident driver, your list may look like this:
- Book some driving lessons with an instructor in order to help improve your driving skills and road sense.
- Practise driving with a family member or friend who is able to give you good advice and improve your confidence.
- Drive alone to a particular place.
- Once you feel confident driving to that place, decide that you will drive alone to another place which is a little further away.
- Practise driving on the highway, first of all with a friend or instructor, and then alone.
Once you have followed each of these steps, it is very likely that you will be much less afraid of driving and fear will no longer be your enemy.
Once you have tackled one area in which you were initially afraid to take action, you will feel more confident about dealing with other areas of your life in the same way. In doing so, you will be creating an exciting future for yourself and you will realize that the possibilities for personal growth are endless. Even though you will still experience a certain amount of fear as you move forward, the knowledge that you will succeed in spite of your fear will propel you onwards into a brighter future.