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Are You a Turnoff?

Are You a Turnoff

Sometimes we get the idea in our heads that we should "just be ourselves" and if others don't like it they can lump it. If the image you're portraying, however, isn't at least a little fine-tuned, you may be at risk of turning people off. Your relaxed image may be the very thing that is standing in your way of gaining dates or suitable employment.

There's a lot to be said about relaxing, being yourself and showing others who you really are. Genuine people draw others in. But who is it you are portraying yourself to be? Can letting it all hang loose actually work against you?

So are you a turnoff? In many cases the answer may be "yes". Here are a few scenarios you might want to look at:

  1. If you've got a hot body, that's great, but if all your free time is spent developing your body to the exclusion of other interests or people, then it will become apparent you are self-absorbed. If you can't stop looking at yourself and talking about how hot you are, you can actually be a turn-off. No one wants to waste their time on someone all wrapped up in themselves.
  2. If you are an "anything goes" type where your wardrobe is concerned, you might want to think again. Women are turned off by guys in dirty, wrinkled shirts with buttons missing and ill-fitting stained jeans. If you've been wearing the same shoes for five years, chances are they are both out-of-date and worn, which indicates you don't care about your self-image.
  3. Guys are turned off by girls whose bellies bulge through too tight tops, or when bare bellies droop beneath too short t-shirts. Too much cleavage showing can actually work against you and make those around you feel uncomfortable. Low-cut tops are inappropriate for most workplace settings and give an unprofessional look. Do you want to be seen for who you are, or for your boob size?

    Take a long good look in your closet and get updated. Look at yourself in the mirror from a variety of angles. If you don't know how to dress yourself, ask a store clerk to help you find appropriate, flattering clothing. Clothes do make a person.
  4. Maybe toilet humour was popular when you were a kid, but there comes a time when it comes across as immature and rude. Farting and belching in public are just plain turnoffs. Take a long good look at how you act in social settings and take an inventory of old habits that need changing. Read an etiquette book if you are completely uneducated about proper decorum. If you have a chronic 'gas' problem, see a doctor about changes to your diet.
  5. What does drinking mean to you? Is drinking something you do while enjoying other activities, or is drinking the main activity? Do you drink until you're drunk or passed-out? Being a drunk isn't cool. It shows a lack of self-control and may show your worst side. You may actually make those you want to impress run the other way for fear they will end up in a relationship with an alcoholic. It is never appropriate to get drunk at work-related socials. You earn a bad reputation when you do. Some businesses have restrictions on having alcohol at work-related functions for safety reasons and in order for their insurance to stay intact. Respect the rules of your employer.
  6. Be cautious of what you post on social networking sites, or what photos you are tagged in. Lewd photos and inappropriate status updates can break you. Potential employers, significant others, and those in your business and social network can easily become turned off and want to cut ties with you if they don't approve of what they see.

Do a regular check-up to make sure you aren't sliding down the slippery slope of turning others off with inappropriate behaviour, shoddy looks, self-absorbed conversation and a questionable portfolio of photos. Instead, show off your good qualities, like the ability to be kind, encouraging, a good listener, well-mannered and professional. It will get you further ahead in life!

Comments (7)

Leibherr580
I don't have a drink problem beer I go out get drunkbanana fall downrolling on the floor laughing no problemsleep
rent2own
@ Caring College Mom

&

@ Stevie B


Since each of you made your posts quite some time ago, perhaps you will not see this. However, I want to say that I agree with what each of you said 100 %. NO ONE should ever detour from being their true self to impress someone or to gain their approval.

However, certain things, such as cleanliness, not using offensive language in public, and other society norms should be followed. Unless an individual is homeless; if one is able to smell your distinct body odor 1/4 block away, get a clue !!! Also, use of profanity; although it seems to be more prevalent in todays age, by BOTH men and women, just isn't acceptable in certain circumstances.

There are other things which some people do, which are offensive to others, but I do not have the right to tell anyone else how they should behave. It has already been stated that by one's actions, they may be hurting themselves, but if they don't care; so be it.

dunno
LuckyDuck2018
Shy away and turning them off hmm might reason enough.angel
NOSTRUS
A certain image attracts a certain kind of man and vice versa . If you take care of how you look then I expect a man to present a similar look not immaculate just clean fresh healthy ......guys with big unkempt beards are guys who can't be bothered to take care of themselves if they can't look after themselves they won't be much support to you either . A smile makes anyone immediately attractive. Hugely overweight people men or women are not attractive... yes it's hard to hear painful but guess what ? ......you can change look after your health it's more important than any thing else .
CaringCollegeMom
No one else can be you, so be yourself. I don't like if people look down their noses at me because I love wearing sweats to college, those kinds of people can kiss my A*@

I am not here to impress or change who I am for someone else.
If you don't like what you see, then hey STOP LOOKING!!!!

But it is kinda funny, that the people who can't stop looking are the ones who claims not to like you for who you are and maybe they are jealous because you are you and they are not themselves.

I is who I are and I like it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yella1058
:) Change is not a bad thing, if u think you're changing for the better or improving yourself... why not? go ahead ...
Stevie_B
An interesting article, however, I'm sure the intent is to help and educate, but the tone comes off as preachy and condescending, which I'm sure wasn't the authors intent.

However that said, people SHOULD be themselves at the expense of 'Turning Others Off', simply because when they stop being themselves and get attention for it....They aren't getting the attention.

The person they are 'trying' to be is getting the attention.... this is obviously. So for anyone and everyone...ALWAYS be yourself. Never change to impress or be liked, because you become FALSE, false to the person your trying to attract and false to yourself.

Why would anyone do that to themselves?... If you don't like yourself by all means change, however if YOUR HAPPY with YOU, then stay you, even if others don't like it.

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