How to Break Up With Your Girlfriend

Breaking up is truly hard to do. It is not an easy task especially when you need to do it to someone you really care about. It can be highly emotional, messy, and even violent. It is, however, something that must be done when the course of the relationship has reached an end. It is tempting to simply disappear and not call back without providing any explanation but that is obviously the cowardly thing to do. The best course of action that will benefit all parties involved is to come clean and take action. A clean breakup is the only way to go.

Be Certain

An unexpected breakup will cause a lot of emotional damage to you and your partner so you need to be certain that it is the only option left. Think it through and weigh all the pros and cons of ending the relationship. Once you drop the bomb, there will be no going back.

Be Personal

Common courtesy dictates that breakups must be done face to face. You can have minor discussions over the phone but you need to do the actual "talk" in person. You need to fight the urge of staying as physically far from her as possible and do the gentlemanly act by facing her. Breakups that happen via text messages or email are cowardly and insulting.

Don't Let Her Be the Last to Know

Talk to her first before letting your friends know about your decision. Talking to other people can pre-empt the news and it may even spread through the grapevine. It is highly disrespectful to her if she finds out about your decision from other people. You can consult your friends about your relationship troubles but you need to keep your decision to end the relationship private.

Select a Neutral Location

Make sure to break the news at a place where you can both openly discuss your feelings. The best location would be somewhere that she can make an easy exit without the need to drive or commute. It is not a good idea to break up at your place because she will feel trapped in your territory. Breaking up in a restaurant is a good idea if you think that she will not make a scene or engage in a heated conversation. Put a lot of thought into the location, and make sure that her well-being is your primary consideration.

Be Clear and Concise

Do not prolong her agony by going through a long and scripted monologue. She needs to get the message clearly and in the shortest possible time. She deserves an explanation for your decision but it does not have to be a summary of your entire relationship. Focus on the main factors that led to the broken relationship. Try to be very logical about your reasons and motivations.

Help her realize that the decision to break up is a difficult one for you. The last thing she needs is to feel alone in her sorrow. At the same time, you need to make it crystal clear that you have both reached the end of the road and there is no other option but to split up.

Get Her to Buy-In

In all likelihood, your girlfriend already knows that things have not been working out for the both of you. Ask her if she feels the same issues and gaps in the relationship. Ask her if things could have ended up differently given a different set of circumstances. Making her realize that she knows the breakup is coming will make it easier for her to accept the separation. It would be beneficial for the both of you if the breakup ends up as a mutual decision.

Terminating a relationship is not an easy task. It requires courage and emotional maturity. Make sure to follow through with the decision that you made and believe that both of you will be happier without each other.