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Dear Men: How to Lose at Internet Dating

Dear Men How to Lose at Internet Dating

Internet dating essentially allows you to shop for a mate while you sit in your boxers at the computer. A guy can enter in his own criteria for what he wants in a girl, thereby avoiding cluttering his computer dominion with profiles outside of his preferences. It appears there are millions of searching – maybe even desperate! – females out there looking for a man. What could be easier than simply whipping up your own online profile and connecting with all these beautiful, available women? But wait... it's not that simple, gentleman. There are several prevalent mistakes many men make when creating a dating profile. These are things that annoy women, cause them to laugh at you, or assume you are a creep. Check out the list below so you don't become one of thoseguys.

1. Saying you have amazing, awesome wunderkids and they will always come first. Some guys will even add "so if you can't accept that, keep looking". Here's what women think when they see this: guy has spoiled brats and she will always have to play second fiddle. Most women realize that men of a certain age will likely have kids. Many women have kids and understand the monumental love, time and dedication it takes to raise them. You don't need to rub her nose in it. Women want to know that they will always be respected and special to you, and that there is room in your life for the partner you are seeking, as well as your children.

2. Stating you are drama free and are looking for a woman with no drama. This just sounds suspicious. You don't have a loony relative or an unpredictable job, anything that might someday throw a curveball your direction? You really know drama will never come your way? Furthermore, women reading this assume you have had at least one crazy ex who might still be a factor, because crazy exes often don't ever truly disappear. She might also imagine you labeling her emotions as drama and running out on her when she cries or gets angry. By now she has decided you are a wimp and unable to handle people and situations that aren't easy.

3. Posting creepy profile pictures. You may not realize it, but that unsmiling picture you snapped at arm's length in your dimly lit kitchen, with dying moths accentuating the dark circles under your eyes, makes you look creepy. The best pictures are those obviously taken by another person at a place where you look happy. A girl will try to assume if you have friends to take pictures of you in public, then you can't be that weird.

4. Lying about your height. When you post your profile under the "tall" section and then divulge that you are 5'7", you are annoying. It appears you are purposely trying to buck the search system. Tall should mean about 6' and over. Likewise, you do not get to list yourself as "big and tall" if you are big but short, or tall but scrawny. You have to be both, that's why there is a heading for this specific type of man!

5. Demanding to be accepted for who you are... yet severely limiting the criteria for who may contact you. The demands usually have to do with the previously listed items. You might expect women to accept everything from your beer gut, to your dog, to pampering your kids, but only if she is 15 years younger than you and possesses the 25 physical attributes you have clearly indicated.

6. Forgetting that the calender date is on the pictures you scanned. Many guys forget that most older photographs have the date printed on them. Nothing screams insincerity or redflag like posting a 10 year old picture of yourself.

7. Implying you are too good for dating sites but somebody else convinced you to try it. This might be an attempt to look pure compared to all those other scallywags who have obviously been whoring around on the site for eons. However, no woman really falls for this. She will think you sound wishy-washy and condescending.

Hopefully, these observations will inspire you to reevaluate your dating profile and improve it if necessary. The list was meant to provide you with a humorous, inside perspective on what women talk about and notice in the profiles of men. Being aware of how your profile appears and compares to others just might determine whether or not you finally find that girl of your dreams.

Comments (2)

oscar20046
I am a man and really enjoyed reading through this. There is a lot of truth to it. devil
esperanzado
At this point i just wished i could get at the very least a Avatar date.laugh

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