Being in a long-distance relationship is a challenge. It involves loneliness and trust issues and needs constant attention and care. It tests your patience and challenges the strength of the relationship itself. Long-distance relationships require hard work and an understanding. Here are five things that you need to avoid to make your long-distance relationship work.
Small fights can spice up your relationship and make your bond stronger. They keep you on your toes and make you more sensitive to the needs of your partner. They also make great stories and conversation pieces. Prolonging arguments, however, will do your relationship more harm than good. Lingering feelings of anger and resentment can destroy the very foundation of your partnership.
Questions of fidelity often cause arguments between couples who live far away from each other. They start questioning the whereabouts of their partners. They become paranoid about cryptic social media posts. They become curious about their partner's new friends and colleagues. They start wondering if the lack of intimacy and togetherness will cause their partner to cheat.
Your relationship is in jeopardy once you doubt your partner's fidelity. Trust is required if you want your long-distance relationship to work. Never make your partner feel untrustworthy. Discuss your concerns with your partner and keep an open mind. Communicate freely and try to reach a compromise that will put both your minds at ease.
Long-distance relationships will test your patience, especially if you and your partner operate on different schedules. You will constantly face challenges such as unanswered phone calls, delayed email replies and ignored text messages. You will be plagued with connectivity issues and work emergencies. Conflicts in sleeping time will also test your patience and your desire to communicate with your partner.
Create a communication schedule and try to stick to it. Make a commitment to set aside a few minutes for each other on a daily basis. Find a reasonable common time that works for both of your schedules. Having a timetable will allow you and your partner to know exactly when to expect a response.
The nuances of facial expression and body language help get your message across during a conversation. These are things that are lacking when you use phone calls, emails, chat rooms and text messaging to communicate with your partner. A simple joke may be taken out of context. Misunderstandings can occur in relationships that lack face-to-face conversations.
Sarcastic remarks may be taken at face value and can come across as offensive or arrogant. It is best to keep things simple and state things as they are. Always be clear and concise. You also need to be sensitive enough to know when you have missed your mark. Make sure to follow up with a clarifying statement if you can't keep yourself from saying a sarcastic remark.
A relationship is a two-way street. It involves you, your partner and the life that you are trying to build together. Focusing too much on yourself will make your partner feel inadequate and even neglected. Your loneliness, frustrations and fears are not your own because your partner feels exactly the same way. You both have to live with the decision to maintain a relationship despite the physical distance. You both need to remember that you are both in the same situation.
Learn to acknowledge each other's feelings and try to make compromises that will benefit the both of you. Take time to know how your partner is doing and draw strength from each other. A healthy relationship has no space for the "me attitude" because it involves a couple who works together to make something last.
"Breakup threats" are warnings made to imply an impending end to the relationship. This happens when one of the parties says the relationship will be over when things do not go his or her way. Threatening your partner weakens the stability of your relationship. It will keep your partner tense, worried and fearful. Threats are never good because it forces the other party to blindly succumb to your whims or call you out on your bluff.
Be respectful of your partner's point of view. Open communication is healthy because it allows both parties to state what they have in mind without fear of being judged or shut down. Let the discussion take its course and listen to each other's arguments.
It creates fear of an upcoming "breakup" on every misunderstanding you will have. Always focus on the issue at hand. Discuss things with understanding and respect for each other's point of view.
Long-distance relationships require trust, hard work and patience. It also needs a healthy dose of open communication to make it strong and enduring.
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