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AS WE GROW OLDER...

As we grow older, and hence wiser, we slowly realize that wearing a $300. or $30.00 watch - - - - - - -
they both tell the same time...;

Whether we carry a $300 or $30.00 wallet/handbag - - - - - - - the amount of money inside is the same;

Whether we drink a bottle of $300 or $10 wine - - - - - - - - - - - - the hang over is the same;

Whether the house we live in is 300 or 3000 sq.ft....if you live in it on your own... loneliness is the same.

You will realize,as you grow older that true inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world.

Whether you fly first or economy class, if the plane goes down - - - - - - --you go down with it...

Therefore... when you have mates, buddies and old friends, brothers and sisters, who you chat with, laugh with, talk with, have sing songs with, talk about north-south-east-west or heaven & earth, .... That is true happiness!!

Five Undeniable Facts of Life :

1. Don't educate your children to be rich.
Educate them to be Happy.
So when they grow up they will know
the value of things not the price.

2. Best awarded words in London ...
"Eat your food as your medicines.
Otherwise you have to
eat medicines as your food."

3. The One who loves you will never leave you
because even if there are 100 reasons
to give up ... he or she will find a reason to hold on.


4. There is a big difference between
a human being and being human.
Only a few really understand it.

5. You are loved when you are born.
You will be loved when you die.
In between, You have to manage!

If you just want to Walk Fast, Walk Alone!
But if you want to Walk Far, Walk Together!


Six Best Doctors in the World
1. Sunlight
2. Rest
3. Exercise
4. Diet
5. Self Confidence and
6. Friends

Maintain them at all stages and enjoy a healthy life.thumbs up

HAVE A WONDERFUL AND PROSPEROUS DAY!cheers yay
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMORNTHEP!

HAPPY, HAPPY, BIRTHDAYhappy birthday party cake balloons party hat dancing boogie dance to Amorn (aka S.A.) My good friend I wish you the best today and every day! You are a very "special lady" here on the blogs and loved!kiss kiss hug teddybear bouquet

Are you doing anything special on your birthday with your daughter and family?
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12 Things A Real Gentleman Does Differently!

Three-piece suits, pocket squares and fob watches may be coming back into fashion, but that doesn’t mean the guys wearing them can be classified as ‘gentlemen.’ Today we’re going to have a look at the qualities a true gentleman possesses. I’d also like to point out this is just as relevant to women, because essentially being a gentleman means not being a jerk to people, and there are plenty of girls who can apply this philosophy to their every day lives. So when you’re reading these points, be aware I’m talking to both genders. Also, know you won’t be finding any rubbish about dress sense, wine knowledge or vocabulary here.

1. They’re Respectful…To Everyone!

2. They Support Their Partners’ Dreams And Goals!

3. They’re Honest And Open!

4. They Don’t Abandon Their Partner When Things Get Tough!

5. They’re Polite – To Everyone!

6. They Keep Doors Open For Everyone!

7. They Compromise!

8. They’re Feminists....A real gentleman is aware feminism is the belief that both men and women deserve to be treated equally, and they will have absolutely no problem with that!

9. They Help People!

10. They Put Family First!

11. Their Actions Speak Louder Than Words!

12. They Don’t Claim to Be ‘Nice Guys’!


There you have it! How many people on here would say they qualify as a "Real Gentleman"? If so, speak up!

I'll be first to say I am a Real Gentleman!

thumbs up
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Abby takes the day off work and decides to go golf

He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit. 9Iron"

Abby looks around and doesn't see anyone. "Ribbit.9Iron."

He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts his other club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! he hits it 10 inches from the cup.

He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh?" The frog reply's "Ribbit. Lucky frog."

Abby decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" he asks. "Ribbit. 3 wood."

Abby takes out a 3 wood and Boom! Hole in one. He becomes befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, he golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next? "

The frog reply, "Ribbit, Las Vegas." They go to "Las Vegas and Abby says, "OK frog, now what?" The frog says, "Ribbit, Roulette."

Upon approaching the roulette table, Abby asks, "What do you think I should bet?" The frog replies, Ribbit. $3000,black 6."

Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game, he figures what the heck.

Boom! Tons of cash come sliding back across the table. Abby takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful."

The frog replies,"Ribbit, Kiss Me."

He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him, he deserves it.

With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl.

"And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room."

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing wine
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Two Bowling Teams

This joke is for Minerva.

Two bowling teams, one all blondes, one all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City.

The brunette team rides on the bottom level of the bus, the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team, down below, is wooping it up and having a great time until one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs, and she decides to investigate.

When the brunette reaches the top, she finds the blonde team staring straight ahead at the road, frozen in fear, clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.

"Whats going on up here?" asks the brunette. "We're having a great time downstairs!"

"Yeah," screams a terrified blonde, "but you've got a driver!"

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing cheers
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The Magic Bank Account

>>
>> THE AUTHOR IS NOT KNOWN. IT WAS FOUND IN THE BILLFOLD OF COACH PAUL BEAR BRYANT, ALABAMA, AFTER HE DIED IN 1982
>>
>> The Magic Bank Account
>>
>> Imagine that you had won the following *PRIZE* in a contest: Each morning your bank would deposit $86,400 in your private account for your use. However, this prize has rules: The set of rules:
>>
>> 1. Everything that you didn't spend during each day would be taken away from you.
>>
>> 2. You may not simply transfer money into some other account.
>>
>> 3. You may only spend it.
>>
>> 4. Each morning upon awakening, the bank opens your account with another $86,400 for that day.
>>
>> 5. The bank can end the game without warning; at any time it can say, “Game Over!". It can close the account and you will not receive a new one.
>>
>> What would you personally do?
>>
>> You would buy anything and everything you wanted right? Not only for yourself, but for all the people you love and care for. Even for people you don't know, because you couldn't possibly spend it all on yourself, right?
>>
>> You would try to spend every penny, and use it all, because you knew it would be replenished in the morning, right?
>>
>> ACTUALLY, This GAME is REAL ...Shocked ??? YES!
>>
>> Each of us is already a winner of this *PRIZE*. We just can't seem to see it. The PRIZE is *TIME*
>>
>> 1. Each morning we awaken to receive 86,400 seconds as a gift of life.
>>
>> 2. And when we go to sleep at night, any remaining time is Not credited to us.
>>
>> 3. What we haven't used up that day is forever lost.
>>
>> 4. Yesterday is forever gone.
>>
>> 5. Each morning the account is refilled, but the bank can dissolve your account at any time WITHOUT WARNING...
>>
>> SO, what will YOU do with your 86,400 seconds?
>>
>> Those seconds are worth so much more than the same amount in dollars. Think about it and remember to enjoy every second of your life, because time races by so much quicker than you think.
>>
>> So take care of yourself, be happy, love deeply and enjoy life!
>> Here's wishing you a wonderful and beautiful day. Start “spending”....
>>
>> "DON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT GROWING OLD…!"
>>
>> SOME PEOPLE DON'T GET THE PRIVILEGE!
thumbs up
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King Arthur and the Witch

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?.... What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered.... is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half. Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day.... or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below. BUT.... make YOUR choice before you scroll down below. OKAY?





Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now.... what is the moral to this story?

Scroll down




The moral is.....

If you don't let a woman have her own way....
Things are going to get ugly.
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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The Girls Night Out

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls."

I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the hours passed and the champagne was going down way too easy. Around 3 a.m., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing he'd probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution in order to escape a possible conflict with him.

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him 12:00. He didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got away with that one! Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."

When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "oh shit," cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the cat and farted.


rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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A Big-city Lawyer...

A Big-city Lawyer...


was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull.

The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store.

The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking.

After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn't resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher, "You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn't have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn't have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you"!

The old rancher replied, "Well, I'll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that durned bull came home this morning".rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Letter from Walmart

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse. Yesterday, my dear wife received the following letter from Walmart:

Dear Mrs. Samsel:

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Samsel are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

June 15 - Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

July 2 - Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at five minute intervals.

August 14 - Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

August 15 - Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the Bedding Department.

September 10 - While handling guns in the Hunting Department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.


October 23 - Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"




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Facebook People

For those of our older generation who don't comprehend why Facebook exists.



I am making friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles.



Every day I go down on the street and tell the passers-by what I have eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before and what I will do tomorrow night. Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog and my gardening and spending time in my pool.



I also listen to their conversations and I tell them I love them.



And it works.



I already have 3 people following me: 2 police officers and a psychiatrist.

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Ponderisms for Seniors

I don't need anger management. I need people to stop ticking me off!

Old age is coming at a really bad time!

When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... Now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation!

The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

Lord, grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!

I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights.” I'm very wise.

My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.

Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.

The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes”.

I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.

When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people"?

Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... But it can muffle the sound!

Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?

Lord, Give me patience and give it to me NOW.

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?

At my age "getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I was wanting!
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