Heading into the season of mists and fine rain and my hair is already rioting.
For the next 6 months when it is dry I will look like a dandelion OR when I am caught in the rain I will look like a drowned rat.
Oh, and I took a photo on the new phone. With hat. This photo is so fresh the paint is still wet.
I LOVE my hat, it is so ugly it's cute, but I'd love a second opinion - Hat? Puffball? Or chop my hair short?
Be nice.
Up to now I have surfed the mobile phone revolution pretty lightly on a pay-as-you-go cellphone which allows phone calls and texts, and takes photos because the phone can, but doesn't transmit them because I don't really know why. The p.a.y.g thing, I suppose.
Looking to upgrade, and I am BEWILDERED by the options. I want something I can use fairly intuitively, and I used my daughter's iPad fairly easily (some cursing to start with) so the whole Apple thing doesn't worry me too much. I'm told an android is my computer in miniature.
Any advice? I really don't need 1000 fancy applications (and accompanying price tag), I'm a simple* type. Phone, text, Facebook, Twitter, eBooks and maybe skype more than cover my needs.
*really simple. Use small words.
*hopeful face*
So I was sitting in a Scottish pub garden last weekend, basking in the fierce Scottish sun as dogs collapsed panting and eggs fried on the sidewalk. I ordered a beer shandy and as the first icy frothing mouthful headed for those parts other drinks don't reach, the unusual taste triggered a Moment.
Picture it. I joined one of the biggest breweries in Europe in 2002, and for 10 years I was given a free case of the beer of my choice every month. It made me very popular with my neighbours, because I drink perhaps half a dozen beers a year, so I passed most of it on. In 2012 the brewery moved its accounts to another country and paid me very generously to go away - my redundancy payout was a year's salary - and I loyally continued to drink their brands when and if I drank beer.
Last weekend, I tasted a competitor's beer for the first time in 13 years. It wasn't as good. There's just something about
Amstel um can I say the name?
Doors do close. Here's to windows
Different countries, different refugees, same problems? I don’t think Britain should open its borders to hundreds of thousands of people who think our benefits system is a cash cow to be milked to the last drop. I do think those in desperate need should be given refuge. I don’t know how to tell the difference and have been on the fence but this article, spotted on Facebook, was thought-provoking. I can’t
always be a flitterbug blogger.
I hate this photograph. It wasn't part of the article, and I think it is emotionally manipulative in the extreme - but it made me cry anyway.
I’m not blocking comments, but I don’t expect any.
(The writer, Frankie Boyle, is an angry Scottish comedian, very Tartan Noir, but he turned serious to have his say on the refugee crisis dominating our news at the moment.)
We invade their countries and justify it by saying that our way of life is better, then boggle at the idea they might think living here is great. We pay no attention to how our actions in other countries have precipitated the situation. There has to be something wrong with a world where the best employment option for a farmer in Africa isn’t being a farmer but crossing the Mediterranean on a punctured lilo, only to spend days dangling under a lorry so he can end up selling lollipops in a nightclub toilet. Our indifference is staggering. For a lot of these people their best chance of survival is to dress up as a leopard and hope to get Twitter onside.
Of course the true existential threat to us might come from ourselves. If we can look at another human being and categorise them as ‘illegal’ or that chilling American word ‘alien’, then what has become of our own humanity? To support policies that dehumanise others is to dehumanise yourself. I think most people resist that, but are pressed toward it by an increasingly sadistic elite. If you’re worried about threats to your way of life, look at the people selling the public services from under you. The people who will destroy this (British) society are already here: printing their own money, printing their own newspapers, and responding to undesirables at the gates by releasing the hounds.
Yup don't all shout at once.
Life is a learning curve. If you have a red stair carpet, don't have a ginger cat. And really don't have a white dog. Or get rid of the red carpet.
Worst job - brushing the stairs with a rubber brush. No question.
Every time I have houseguests (and I love to have houseguests) I realize what a lazy housewife I am the rest of the time. By the time the guests arrive I have housemaid's knee, tennis elbow, and want to sleep for a week.
Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country ...
That's quite an oldfashioned sentiment, these days. Never mind what our country can do for us, the WORLD owes us a living, and is being slack about delivering.
Same with love, especially bargaining for it, the way we do on a singles website. We think hmm, what will push the most buttons? Loving: honest: fun: yeah, close enough. I'll stick those in as my description. Now describe the other half - and oh boy, woe betide them if they fail to match up exactly.
I've noticed most of the whinging on here is actually direct clues. Ever noticed how a guy who complains how much emotional baggage women bring along, hauls around a few trunks himself? And don't get me started on a current popular trend in the blogs, how difficult women can be. Ready to bet good money some of you guys have been, and will be, happiest being treated like dirt by difficult women. It's the nice normal women who seem to get kicked in the teeth.
There ARE nice normal women. No, seriously. I've met at least two.
I worked it out this morning as I lay in bed, loving the fact I didn't have to get up (working full-time SUCKS), and day-dreaming.
Whadda we want? Romance. Ludicrously overblown, totally OTT, gasp-out-loud, romance. Oh, not longterm, but don't we all want one frantic nuts insane romantic fling? I've been criticized for commenting on my own blogs
but I'm going to try to find a youtube clip from a fantastic Iranian comedian on the subject because he says it better than I can. He wrote a POEM in his own BLOOD
That's romantic! and insane! And gasp-out-loud oh-yes-please!
When do we want it? NOW
Chances of it happening?
NIL.
This too will pass.
Interesting blog spotted on another website. This woman says she lured a man in with coffee,
and she has him trussed up like a turkey for the benefit of herself, her friends and even some relatives.
She did it on an uncontrollable impulse, and now she’s worrying what will happen when (if) she releases him back into the wild.
She was asking everyone on the website for advice. Her aunts are offering to take him permanently off her hands and take good care of him for as long as he lives. She says he looks a little wild-eyed when they discuss it in front of him.
Coffee, eh?
Do you think it could be our Sola? He's not been around since mentioning going on a coffee date ...
A friend asked to see a pic of a bloke I was seeing. I had a good pic embedded in a very steamy love letter. I saved a copy, deleted the steamy text - then emailed the original by mistake.
Friend of mine was texting on Skype with two people at once, got flustered, said 'let me just get rid of my deathly-dull brother-in-law, then we can talk' - but sent it to the brother-in-law.
To err is human but to really fcuk it up, you need a computer. Mind you, spellcheck and cellphones come up with some beauts too.
Finally put together my wishlist - 14 items
Before you shout, there's nothing on there which I don't offer in return, or something of equal value (well, in my opinion)
I tested it by checking it against the men that have already been in my life. One fell flat for not having an original thought since he turned 40. One had disastrous core values. Etcetera, etcetera, and as the King said, etcetera. Main thing, the list is WORKING.
What's the most important thing on yours?
Men, please tell me what has put you off a woman instantly and forever, very early on. I want to put a bloke off.
Women, if you know of something that would put a bloke off instantly, please share.
Thanks.
Just talking to a buddy who says he doesn't cook any more. Now, I'm not a great cook (and say so in my profile because I am So Honest) but even I have 3 or 4 fallback recipes which are easy and even better can usually be kept in their various parts in the pantry or fridge until needed.
Anyone want to start the ball rolling here with suggestions to get us all drooling or at least experimenting?
Cat - there's no porcupine in my pantry, no likelihood of anything closer than a road-kill hedgehog either.
Elegsabiff Blog (358)
