BIG letter "L" for Lotto?

2 won ...1.8 billion plus..
I never tried to play lotto as I just believe, my luck is from my own sweats..but today, a colleague of mine called a family to play for me..
My Dad and my husband came to my dream last night , which they never appeared since they left. My husband still looked super dooper handsome, huggable,kissable, and my dad as well.
That was weird, but I felt so secured with these two men I loved so much.
My dad was telling me, you have been tested, I have that letter "L" for you.
I felt at peace, secure,and unbelievable feeling of knowing, don't worry about...and..and..and..and.
The right time is coming.
The two of them looked at me, and my dad told me, "you are a strong woman,despite the hardships and sufferings ,you could still smile and tell the world you're OK." I am so proud of you .
Then my husband spoke,with his loving eyes and awesome smile...said "It's time for you to move on"
I was waiting for the "L" all about, just when my alarm clock rang .
I woke up and it was clear as the still water in the ocean.
Wow! Am I going to die today? Did GOD did not grant me that 60 years of life I've been wishing?
"It's time for me to move on?"
I just noticed tears coming out from my eyes. I missed these two men I loved most in my life .
Anyhow , am pondering what L word was all about ..
I shared to my colleague about my dream at work today. Asking what L all about???one said Love..other said LOTTO. So she made the combination of numbers from the b days of these two men, when they died their age etc..and called her family back home to play those numbers for me.
So far 3 numbers came out..40 the age of my husband when he died, 1 his birthday month January, and 45, I did not know how she came out with those numbers.
Anyway , Lotto is not what letter L means ..
I tried to figure out those I get connected with, that the name starts with letter L.
He must be the love of my life???
Any clues about Letter L???kindly drop a comment please..