Scottish Obituary
by Gentlejimunknown, Wisconsin, USA
Jan 2019 390 Views 6 Comments
A Scottish woman goes to the local newspaper office to see that the Obituary for her recently deceased husband is published.
The Editor informs her that there is a charge of $1 per word.
She pauses, reflects, and then she says, "Well then, let it read: "Fred Brown died."
Amused at the Woman's thrift, the Editor tells her that there is a seven-word minimum for all Obituaries.
She thinks it over and in a few seconds says, In that case, let it read:
Fred Brown Died ... golf clubs For Sale!!!
The Editor informs her that there is a charge of $1 per word.
She pauses, reflects, and then she says, "Well then, let it read: "Fred Brown died."
Amused at the Woman's thrift, the Editor tells her that there is a seven-word minimum for all Obituaries.
She thinks it over and in a few seconds says, In that case, let it read:
Fred Brown Died ... golf clubs For Sale!!!
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So a guy thought it odd that a primo seat on the 50 yard line was empty at game time.
When it wasn't filled by half time, he went down to inquire why.
A li'l ol' lady was in the seat next to the empty one. The guy asked her if she knew why it was empty.
She explained that she & her hubby had season tickets for fifty years, but he'd passed on.
The guy told her that was touching, but couldn't a family member or friend use the ticket?
The woman explained that they were all at his funeral.
Being a Packer fan himself, the guy understood the situation perfectly.
This would, of course, never happen.
Even if anyone in Wisconsin was stupid enough to schedule a funeral during a Packer game they'd NEVER find a Reverend to preach the obsequies!