Bingewatching movies and the future.
I have spent all day today watching movies on Netflix. I am relaxing, waiting for the time to leave for my third shift at the festival. It's a night shift, from midnight to 8 am, which is the toughest one yet. Nothing much happens, so it'll be nice to relax, for a change. I am bringing my powerbank and something to drink with me, so I don't get completely bored out of my mind. Cars will come, but at some point, they will close the gate, so nobody can come in. That is something I look forward to, since it will mean I will be able to catch up on some things in my life.Regarding my blog yesterday, about messing things up with my friend, who I will refer to as R from now on, I have begun writing a huge apology to her, where I list all the things I have been dishonest about. That was one of her demands, if she was to ever forgive me. So I would have to man up and confess all my wrong doings. It's the only way that I can have any sort of hope to salvage the friendship. I am not expecting things to be the same again, and nor should they. I will always have this hanging over me. At the back of her mind, she will constantly be thinking "Is he lying?". I am prepared for that.
I have this friend, who I go back with a long time. Actually, most of my friendships are extremely long. Anyway, let's call her K. K is currently in a mental facility, being treated for her mental illness. She was the one who gave me my first real kiss, way back in 2010. I was 26 back then, and it just felt right. The day after, she said it was a mistake. It should never have happened, but it did. We wrote each other on and off, and we lost contact five years ago. We only just recently got talking again. Once she has been discharged from the facility, I will visit her. What will happen from there, I do not know. Don't mistake this for me moving on to someone else already, because it's not. I am not like that. The last time I had any sort of romantic involvement with anyone, where it was mutual, was in 2014. The love I have for R started last year, after I met her in person. Before that, me and R had been online buddies for the past 15 years.
Anyway, K is showing an interest in me, because I am there for her, listening to her stories and her complaining. About the meds she is taking, what ails her and how every friend in her life except me are gone. Nobody wants to speak to her, which I think is super mean. She is a wonderful person, and she doesn't deserve that done to her. K and I had a fling at some point, that led up to the kiss, but after that, she became somewhat distant. Wouldn't talk to me or anything. Maybe she was scared to tell me straight. But I would have been fine with her not wanting to be more than friends. As long as I had her friendship, all was good. Luckily, we are past that now.
I also have a story to tell about how I was almost run over twice yesterday, but that will come at a later date.
I will leave comments on - for now. I reserve the right to delete any comments that are of a s*xual nature, since I don't think those are appropriate.
Comments (8)
Philipsen: Whether or not it becomes a relationship: you wrote you will write an honest letter to her, and what I wrote to you, is also part of being honest, and to be honest to you, I don't think she will be happy to hear that you have been writing about her and her visits on your blogs. Whatever happens, good luck to you…..and to her.
If you don't sign your name then she can get the information that she wants and you want to tell her. If you sign your name she could slander you. You may feel she wouldn't do that but maybe 6 months from now she will feel different, then she could show it to anyone she wants but can't prove it's you if you don't sign it.