To protect your male macho image..your manhood
Men have been told to do that since....well since awhile ago.You can't do that to me.
You can't say that to me.
Honey, don't let him/her do that to me/you.
Be a man.
In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with protecting yourself.
There is nothing wrong with defending yourself. However, I think there is a certain extent.
For example, this past weekend. I was having a great time out at the local bar's Halloween party. There was a Korean lady there that seemed to be rather interested in me. We had flirted with each other the whole night. Things were going rather well.
I was sitting at a table away from the bar with a great friend of mine. We were sitting there pretty much the whole evening, near the pool table, talking, and playing pool. The Korean beauty was also playing pool with us as well.
It was getting late, alcohol has certainly taken its effect. I put my quarters in the table, the balls were released. Immediately, the Korean lady ran over, to steal my game. I knew what she was up to...just her way of flirting. I am like, okay...I will just grab some more quarters from the bar, and I will get the next game.
Fine and dandy...but my friend I was with, was not okay with this. I didn't know what he said to her. But, she was gone shortly after their talk. Should I have stepped in....I wonder....but, realistically...given the complete circumstances of the situation, I knew I really didn't have any right to.
The way I looked at it....it was only fifty cents and a couple of minutes before the next game would start. I am a very patient man....so overall...it really was not a big deal.
I was not angry or upset with my friend as I explained to him my philosophy in life when it comes to situations like these...non-threatening...in particular. I told him, I believe in free-will. You hope for people to do the right things, but you cannot be in control of their free will. Especially, with this Korean lady...we had that sort of playful vibe going on all night.
His stance was, you cannot let people take advantage of you like that.
Well....
He does have a point. I am a man. A man is suppose to be in control of the situation. A man should not let anyone disrespect him. True....as it has been taught to us men.
But....before going down this whole principled path...the macro of the whole situation was not even worth taking a "manly" stance. It was in the whole scope of life...nothing.
With that said....after hearing about some guy dying in line getting a chicken sandwich....I wonder if he wouldn't be still alive today if he didn't do the whole macro prospective with the situation he was in. I heard he was with a woman....perhaps he was just being a man.
Comments (38)
The woman was wrong. Your friend had a right to intervene.
Now, because you were flirting with her most of the night and you paid for the table and offered it to her, then that would be a gentleman act on your behalf.
All in all, material things is not worth a trip to the ER or the morgue.
He seems to arrive whenever you post a blog
Thankfully, it was not him at the bar.
Just teasing Robert.
Loh
I agree with that point if I was in some sort of long term relationship with that person.
I think I agree with that statement.
I agree with that.
.....of course, that is what you are saying...is the next time.
Life is about living and learning.
Everyone had a beautiful learning experience that last round.
Hello...first of all.
I agree with you and disagree with you.....coming from my sole perspective....and that is people are allowed to exercise their free will. So with that being said, he didn't overstep....but, it was really not his business...so he did.
The situation was not life threatening to me.
There is no telling what would have resulted with the situation. (without his interference)
Who knows, it might have been a blessing he got involved.
The bottom line, things happened the way they were suppose to happen.
The point of the blog....somethings are better left just to play out with destiny....especially if they are not life threatening. As with the chicken sandwich...something non-life threatening, turned into that...life taking.
...that is what I think anyway...life is not always cut and dry.
@Johnny
And you just need to try to find that reason out.. might take a life time though. That's why simply accepting it sometimes makes life easier.
Nobody should allow themselves to be taken advantage of.
However, as you understood this to be not a case of being taken advantage of, but simply a stage in the flirting process, pigtail-pulling if you will, then the circumstances are different. You were a willing participant.
Maybe you should have explained the flirtation to your friend earlier, and he would have allowed it to flourish instead of killing it.
You have the gift of the written word...
You should really try your hand at some books...
Any subject will do, by the looks of it...
I get the first copy?
If she had walked up to you and said.....Can I play.....it wouldn't have been as much fun. You admit that you knew she was flirting. You and she started something. Not all flirting goes the way we want.
Your friend has different standards than you do. You were willing to walk away, he thought it was important to protect you. Protect you from what? A woman flirting with you?
You made the right decision to let it go. If you had made a fuss, raising your voice, making a scene in the bar other patrons would look your way. Would you be embarrassed and not go in that bar again?
Save the "standing up for yourself" for something that really counts, something that will make a difference.
But...I think everything will be fine.
Maybe my friend took advantage of me?...instead of her?.....one could presume/perhaps
Seriously, I want you to be happy.
I know American men are fine. At least some of them. Especially one of them
Well, something to build from I suppose.
You know, I hesitate to apply labels....I don't think what happen was the ending of something. That is what my gut tells me anyway. Perhaps there was something far more important in that whole social dynamic that went on....that has yet to be talked about.
Anyway, I suppose...like Usha pointed out, one don't want to become a prisoner of their thoughts.
Thanks L.L.
time to take it to the next level.