Flash Fiction #2. The Appointment

Ainsley Goosebutt had to rush home from work on the Friday if he wasn’t going to be late for his doctor’s appointment. He had a quick shower, made himself a cup of tea and a slice of toast, and was back out of the door within forty minutes.

At the surgery, he took a seat and picked up a magazine to fill the time until his name was called. He didn’t have to wait long. After no more than ten minutes the receptionist ushered him into the consulting room.

“Mister Goosebutt,” said Doctor Hermione Huntington, “please sit down. What can we do for you today?”

“It’s my back,” said Ainsley, “I think I must have strained it; it’s really painful.”

“Could you just stand up and lift your shirt for me,” said the doctor, and proceeded to examine Ainsley’s lower back. “Mmm,” she said. “If you just get undressed and lie on the bench, I think I can do something about that.”

Ainsley stripped down to his underpants and started to climb onto the bench, but no sooner had he lifted one leg onto it than the doctor interrupted him.

“Mister Goosebutt, your underpants.”

Ainsley sheepishly removed his pants and laid face down on the bench, and the doctor began to massage his back. After a few minutes she instructed him to turn over.

“Strange as it sounds," she said, “back pain is very often due to tension in the groin.” She then poured an exotic smelling liquid onto Ainsley’s groin and went about relieving the tension in it. In what seemed like no time at all, Ainsley’s symptoms disappeared and he felt completely free of tension.

“Is that better?” asked doctor Huntington, and Ainsley nodded.

“Same time next week,” enquired the receptionist, when Ainsley emerged from the consulting room.

“Yes,” he replied, “but can I be called in for questioning by Chief Inspector Huntington next time, Please.”