As usual, quick as a bunny, Andy Borowitz pens a comedic satire today, based on Trump's recent suggestion to delay the election.
Andy just works out the logistics.
Today in The New Yorker;
In response to:
Satire from The Borowitz Report
Trump Signs Executive Order Banning Month of November
By Andy Borowitz
July 31, 2020
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Donald Trump stirred controversy on Friday by signing an executive order that would ban the month of November.
While legal scholars protested that he did not have the right to reduce the number of months in a year from twelve to eleven, Trump argued that “the Constitution doesn’t say anything about how many months you have to have.”
“All of those smart guys like Jefferson and Madison, those beauties, this is something they didn’t think of,” he said. “I got them on the months.”
Trump said that eliminating November from the calendar was “long overdue,” calling it “a rigged month.”
“November is a hoax,” he said. “Some people say it may not even be a real month.”
Responding to a reporter’s question about the future of Thanksgiving, Trump said that “nobody will miss it.”
“Just ask anyone in this country,” he said. “Nobody has anything to be thankful for.”
Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
Certainly, there's a lot less to be thankful for since Trump took office. However, I'm in no rush to have winter arrive sooner and I definitely don't want to miss out on the impending election. I could do without the pumpkin pie though. It's never been a favorite of mine.
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