What doesn't kill us.....

So I met a guy on CS.... We talked for some time and his lines were really good. For a time I believed him.

But looking back now, I realize his lines had an effect he never anticipated. They made me feel beautiful and confident. So much so that it carried over into real life. Suddenly I wasn't a shrinking violet anymore. I was standing tall and proud, I was even moving differently.

And people noticed. I started getting invitations. I didn't accept. After all, I was in this "relationship". But that is over and the invitations are still there.

So, I will continue my journey and I know I will find the person I am meant to be with. I may get a few more bruises, but they will make me stronger.

I guess what I'm trying to say in my own convoluted way, is that unintentially he gave me something even he can never take back. And the last laugh is on him.

So even the players of this world can have a positive effect, so long as we don't give too much too fast.

teddybear
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Comments (6)

That is great. The very same thing happened to me except it was with my wall being up. He lowered it and I was more compassionate then ever. Like how I was before my first love got to me. Now that it's down after 25 yrs (I know!!! long time!!) I will never allow any situation to build that wall agian. I was going against the grain of who I truly am.

I loved hearing your story. It's great when people mean to harm but actually help.applause
The very same thing use to happen to me 2-3 times in a month. And I really use to get alot of bruises, but they will make me stronger, REALLY stronger.It's great when people mean to harm but actually help, but the only difference is that I began to hate the Males online and I am not so sure I'll continue my journey and I don't know I will find the person I am meant to be with.crying confused dunno
@pavlova

Don't let them get you down. There are treasures out there, we just have to sift through the rubble to find them. It may not be on CS, but don't give up. We are all entitled to love and happiness. No matter what. Just hang in there. But be careful.
teddybear
@Live2Flower

I like your name. And I like your attitude. The secret is that we need to be more careful, without building our walls too high
Reikiangel- I like your comments and spirit. You and another poster on here (sorry can't remember lol) have a great attitude about the relationship not working out.

I love the line about he gave something positive that can never be taken back. I love that you are not at all bitter. I am guilty of making the next guy pay for the last one's offenses and hurts. It is not right. No one is perfect and at times we may disappoint or hurt others intentionally or not.

I will remember your attitude and it will help me to move forward and not stay stuck on what someone did- because if I am truly honest with myself I have done damage too.

As you said, it is a journey and there is no reason to get stuck in one place forever.

Thank you for the inspiration Reikiangel-you are a beautiful lady! You will find the right one for you. When you do, he will be a very special and lucky guy!

bouquet
@ladybugg79 ... Thank you so much for your kind words. I try not to be bitter and angry, as I don't like to carry all that baggage around. Yes, it does hurt when these things happen, and makes it a little harder to trust next time. But as you said, none of us are perfect, and have done our own share of hurting. We can never really forget, but we need to take it on the chin, pick ourselves up and move on. Time heals all wounds. As long as we learn from our mistakes, it has value.

I truly love life and this journey we are all on. It's okay to explore the little footpaths and see the view while we are on our journey. Even with the bumps and bruises, even if we stumple or fall at times, it's all worth it.

I know I will meet my soulmate somewhere on this journey we call life. There is no way of knowing where we'll meet. So, I will keep my heart and eyes open. He may be just around the next curve. But if I don't meet him.... That's okay too. I can be happy by myself, doing the things I love to do, exploring the world, and learning new cultures and languages.

I still believe in love, I still believe in trust, but I do take more time to get to know someone now before I let things progress to the next step. And of course I am careful, I check the person out as much as possible. That has nothing to do with trust. It is just smart. There are wayyyy to mant scammers (male and female) around not to try and protect yourself as much as you can.

My heartfelt wish for everyone, is that we will all find that one person we are meant to be with, without getting hurt too much on the way.

In the words of someone far wiser than me ...... (Kahlil Gibran)
When love beckons to you, follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as
he is for your growth so is he for your pruning. Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun, So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself. He threshes
you to make you naked. He sifts you to free you from your husks. He grinds you to whiteness. He kneads you until you are pliant; And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God’s sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure, Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor, Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, ‘God is in my heart,’ but
rather, ‘I am in the heart of God.’
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if
it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself. But if you love
and must needs have desires, let these be your desires: To melt
and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness. To be wounded by your own understanding of love; And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving; To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy; To return home at evening tide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart
and a song of praise upon your lips.
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