Rusty Meets Kissy's Great Grandmother

Back in the ole western cowboy daze, around the 1890s, Rusty Nuds went to a casino & saloon place called Fad Asez. It was there that he saw a beautiful lady dressed in violet and red undies with polka dots and pink fluffy slippers. Accompanied by the saloon Pee-anist, she was singing.

She was singing that ole western song "Heart of Glass' by Blondie. She sang, "Once I had a love and it was a gas. Soon turned out to be a pain in the azzz."

When the music took a break, Rusty done went up to the piano man and asked, "Hey Piano man, wats the lady's name?"

The piano man answered, "Don't be stuck up, ask her yourself. Sheesh! Next thing ya know, you'll be wanting me to go bring you the vi*gra pills too."

"And by the way, I am the Pee-anist, not the piano man."

Rusty asked, "What the forks the difference?"

The piano man explained, "Well, what with all the beer I swig down, I gotta take a break every few minutes to pee. So ya see, since I pee a lot, customers call me a Pee-anist."

Upon completing those words, the piano man rushed away quickly to the outhouse.

Rusty then set his eyes on the lovely violet-dressed lady leaning against the piano and-a said, "Hey there pretty lady. You're very pretty. Yess, you are. You turn me on! Woo hoo! Now, eh allows me to intra-duce myself. I am Rusty Nuds. Whatz your name, if I may have the pleasure of knowing?"
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The lady answered, "Rusty what? Well, you sure look and smell like you need a darn bath with soap, ajax, bleach, your clothes and all of you."

Rusty baffled, replied, "Ma-am, I only done asked what your name is, not fer yoos ta critisize me and all."

Lady in violet and red undies with polka dots replied, "Alright, alright! I heard you the third time. You don't have to get your shorts all wedged up in the back. My name is Kissy."

Rusty: "Kissy? What da hail kinda name is that for a woman?"

Lady in violet and red undies with polka dots turned her behind to Rusty and said, "It's Kissy, Kissy MyGrits! Now buy me a mug of beer!"
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Rusty replied, "Why couldn't your name be Red? Ya know, to match your red underwear with polka dots? That way if we fool around tonight and split up later, like most one night stands do, you could be my Ex, my Ex-Red. I kinda like the sound of that name. Cute, huh?"

Rusty buys lots of beer that night for he and Kissy. They come to know each other very well that night. So much so, that they had a very exclusive romantic relationship for 24 hours.

Ah - but then came the heartbreak. Yes, Kissy MyGrits started cheating on ole Rusty with, of all people, the Pee-anist.

That thar Pee-anist started wearing adult diapers to control his frequent outhouse visits, although when the diapers got full, they would swish around, make noise and smell bad. However, them diapers helped the Pee-anist to have less visits to the outhouse, which gave him more time to B-S, err I mean to talk to Kissy MyGrits and win her over.

Rusty was heartbroken, but with a steady heavy drinking of beer, he overcame the heartbreak and moved onto the next week where he would meet another pretty lady, this one by the name of Chloe Cobwebs.

And so it would come that several years later, Kissy MyGrits would have a great granddaughter named after her. She would be known as Kissy Myas.

This has been the ole western daze story of when Rusty Nuds met Kissy Myas' great grandmother, Kissy MyGrits.

PS: Story is fictional. Or is it?
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Comments (12)

A song to accompany this heartwarming romantic story:

"Heart Of Glass" by Blondie

Once I had a love and it was a gas
Soon turned out had a heart of glass
Seemed like the real thing, only to find
Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind

Once I had a love and it was divine
Soon found out I was losing my mind
It seemed like the real thing but I was so blind
Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind

In between
What I find is pleasing and I'm feeling fine
Love is so confusing, there's no peace of mind
If I fear I'm losing you it's just no good
You teasing like you do

Once I had a love and it was a gas
Soon turned out had a heart of glass
Seemed like the real thing, only to find
Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind

Lost inside
Adorable illusion and I cannot hide
I'm the one you're using, please don't push me aside
We coulda made it cruising, yeah

Yeah, riding high on love's true bluish light
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh

Once I had a love and it was a gas
Soon turned out to be a pain in the a**
Seemed like the real thing only to find
Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, oh
Wow Robert...Myas' mother. laugh Rusty is a real woman charmer....he can get into any woman's undies, like he was scooping butter. rolling on the floor laughing dunno

And Johnny, who can blame Rusty? Don't Kissy MyGrits' big red underwear with polka dots just turn you on?

Cool, huh?
cheers is pretty cool. laugh doh
K....Robert....I only had a brief moment here before la-la land. :) Take care friend, will be back on soon.


have a good night's sleep. I know you'll be dreaming of Kissy MyGrits' red undies with polka dots.
And - and who can blame you? dunno

I like your rusty story.
Howdy BlueSky,

I'm glad you like Rusty and his adventures.

You know, Rusty may be Dusty, but he sure meets up with a lot of fun women, and gets in some odd situations too. cowboy
Old man Nuds is a modern day Cassanova. thumbs up

Rusty must be an ole western days "pick up artist." A true playboy. The women love that guy!

Doesn't have much money. Doesn't have a car, a horse yes, but no car. Doesn't have teeth, not real ones anyways. YET, the guy's a real Romeo.

Wonder what he's got that attracts the women?
Maybe it's just his personality and style.

Ha-ha-ha...I like these polka dots and all...
Hi there Grapewine wave

Yep, Kissy MyGrits and her Polka Dots Undies are sure fashionable. Johnny seems to think they're great looking on her.

Could this be the next new fashion sensation? uh oh
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Somewhere, California, USA

I am friendly and I do my best to be understanding. I work hard and thoughtfully to hopefully always make life happier and better for myself and those I may love and care about. [read more]

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created Jun 23
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Last Commented: Jun 29
Last Edited: Jun 23
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