I know
there are quite a few people offering me strength this morning. And I thank you. I need it.this morning, in the shower, i got frustrated because how are you supposed to wash your right foot when you can't stand on just your left foot. Actually I sat down and that worked fine. Then i thought bad thoughts about myself, castigating myself for making a fuss when I am really not that badly off.
Then I stopped that. The truth is, for me, this is a nightmare of coping and confusion. Today it is not about anybody else. It is about me. My feelings and my fears are just as real, as valid, as anybody else's.
So today I am going to treat me the way I treat other people. This is a big scary thing, I am doing all the things I need to do.I am doing my best and once you hit a superlative you cannot go any higher. These are the things I would say to someone else (of course, I would change the pronoun!).
And to all who offer support and send a thought or prayer my way, know I will feel it. i believe that.
Comments (2)
I understand well what you are going through. I still have my moments where I trip and fall and add a new bruise to the collection. Sometimes my sight goes fuzzy and I have trouble finding words and remembering simple math problems.
While feeling sorry for myself, I realized that I'm not all that bad off. These feelings that we have are in trying to sort things out.I think it's normal, but I'm not sure. I had an MRI on my brain last year and nothing of significance was found either- with the exception of some sinus inflammation. I suppose it didn't help that I had a sinus infection when the MRI was taken.
Our brains are remarkable things. Just because we have glitches and hiccups, maybe it's a reminder that we are human beings after all. You are not alone in this journey, Dear Friend.
Dana and Emily (my daughter)