more music

Oh no, I forgot where I was! I started writing this with the intent of creating a chronological history of music and events in my life, went on far to long, and had to edit harshly. Saved the rest to word and hope I can catch that train of thought.
The next chapter in a life (chapin ref.) would have to be marriage. Got married in 1986 to a wonderful girl, she walked out, for the last time, 20 years later a mean selfish, self-centered hateful woman. Our marriage started with me singing Randy Travis tunes and dancing her around the living room and ended with Linkin Park and me "Crawling in my sleep" (these wounds will never heal) and a whole lot of ''Numb".
Just an aside, no one has to put up with abuse from anyone, you CANNOT make them better! I know this!
This leads me to my most recent girlfriend, loving, caring, funny everything a man could want. Our music ran from the 50s to today covering all genres, just like our romance free and unencumbered. No one song was ours. Each day, every moment was filled with music, loving every minute of it. We had a great year and a half until she figured out that there was a committment issue, hers, she couln'nt. Nice guy, good heart, somethings missing, etc etc etc. Then for the first time music no longer was a friend, the comforting melodies and lyrics that expressed what was in my heart were not there, I could'nt even turn on the radio, every song touched a place deep in my heart that hurt. If a song came into my head it would only cause me pain and not be of any comfort. Music had been taken away from me. Even the mad as hell break up songs were no good, we parted as friends, goes back to nice guy I quess. There was no release, no where for the pain to go. I had no outlet, each and every day was a nightmare. I had depended on the music to cleanse my soul and now it only made living through each day more difficult. It was a rough couple of months. Eventually the music hurt less and less and I would only have to change the station on some songs, the pain faded. Now only fond memories remain, when a certain song comes on the radio, once again the music is tied to a moment in my past and can trigger a flood of memories.A single note from a familiar song will fill my heart and give me that release I need. Now the songs that brings me comfort are by Flogging Molly, "Laura", "your beauty will never fade" and a little of "Black Friday Rule" "down in this world, down and almost broken" each end of the emotional spectrum! I'ts nice to have the music back.
I had meant for this to cover much more of my life but ended up just covering some points, mostly centered around the women in my life. As time goes on I'll be writing more about the other times in my life and the music that helped me carry on. So much life, so much music!