I think its okay to be a little scared sometimes.

Its kind of funny really, scared...since I was a little kid being scared was something I strived to not be. I guess you could say I did quite good at it, priding myself on never backing down no matter what ...that attitude got me in a lot of shit over the years but it also probably saved my life a few times too. you know prison can be a scary place at times but you never show it , I guess you just draw on that boys don't cry crap that we get bought up with,you take the knocks on the chin and get on with it.those that have known me over the years would say that nothing bothers me that can't be sorted out with a crack. but the thing is people change times change and your heart changes too. I'm starting my whole life over.My baby girl has lost her mummy and I'm all she's got and I want to be the best dad I can. be a positive role model and make sure she grows up to be the best she can feeling loved and supported.its a big call cos its so different from what I knew as a child. I have to get a real job and start being a responsible productive member of society. the cops seized most of my assets a while ago and I'm determined not to get anything the wrong way. I guess what I'm saying is that I 'm a little scared...I have an important responsibility in raising my girl and I don't want to mess it up but yeah I'm scared alright...to me living a "normal" life is probably what the inside of a maximum security is to you. but I'm going to apply the skills that kept me alive in those places to this, persistent determination and self belief. I know I can do this....its just a little scary that's all.